Overflow
by amethyst-uk
Summary: Blaine doesn't care if he has to take things slow with Kurt. He loves him enough to wait as long as it takes. It's just sometimes his body seemed to move by itself and not listen to his mind when he tells it to stop…
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Don't own.

**Summary:** Blaine doesn't care if he has to take things slow with Kurt. He loves him enough to wait as long as it takes. Is just sometimes his body seemed to move by itself and not listen to his mind when he tells it to stop…

**Warnings: **English is not my first language, so please forgive me for any mistakes. Also, see the rating? It's M for a reason. Be sure to be comfortable with it, especially for later chapters.

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><p>"We should probably stop…" said Kurt panting a bit, face nervous. Blaine just smiled as supportively as he could a nodded. Of course he'd stop if Kurt asked him to. They haven't been together even a month, and he knew Kurt was new to all of this. The kisses, the touches, the embraces… he had been guarding himself for too long to just be comfortable with it this soon. Blaine knew. He had expected it from the beginning.<p>

But it was damn hard to keep calm when he was with Kurt. He just… he couldn't stop himself. The way Kurt spoke softly when they were alone, the ways his eyes shined with a knowing smile because they were together and it was just _perfect_. The way he was always ready when Blaine tried to kiss him off guard, the way he would shyly part his lips when Blaine deepened the kiss… it was all too much for him. And he would find himself desperate for more, but trying to go easy because he didn't want to scare Kurt away. Kurt trusted him. Even when Blaine had screwed up in the past, Kurt still trusted him. He wasn't about to break that.

So he just laid back on the coach in the deserted Common Room in Dalton's Academy, taking Kurt's hand in his and caressing it. Kurt had a small smile on his lips, like he was still going through the small make out session they were just shearing, and Blaine just closed his eyed and rested his head, humming to himself. Life was fucking perfect.

When he opened his eyes again, Kurt was looking at him, unreadable expression in his face… he seemed somewhat nervous.

"What is it?" Asked Blaine, frowning a bit.

"Do you mind if I ask you something? Something personal?" Asked Kurt. Blaine raised an eyebrow.

"Kurt, you're my boyfriend. You can ask me anything you want."

"Even if it's personal?"

"Anything." Assured Blaine.

"Ok…" Kurt hesitated a bit. "I just wanted to know… Umm… I gathered from what you've told me… you're not a virgin…" said Kurt awkwardly. It wasn't a question.

"Err… no, I'm not" said Blaine a bit confused but expectant. It wouldn't bother Kurt that he wasn't, right?

"I… I guess that boyfriend you told me about? Mathew, wasn't it?" Blaine nodded. "He was the first." Stated Kurt, and Blaine nodded again. "Was he the only one?" he asked finally, and Blaine understood finally what he was getting into.

Well, it was fine with him, really. If Blaine knew all about Kurt's past relationships (never mind they were just a fake girlfriend, a one-sided crush and an unwanted kiss), Kurt should know all about his. Is not like there was much anyways…

"No, not quite…" Blaine answered. Kurt looked at him expectantly and Blaine sighed. Ok, so he had to elaborate. "There was Mathew of course… he was my first. He was a senior when I came in freshman year here to Dalton. It was really nice 'cause he helped me through the whole 'accepting myself' thing… he heard me sing one day and insisted I join the Warblers… I own that to him, you know? Since the Warblers became my family..." Kurt was looking at him with a small smile. Blaine guessed he could relate to that. "But then he graduated and left for College in San Francisco, and we both decided to end it up. We still talk a bit… he comments my Facebook every time something about a Warbler performance comes up. He was a big fan." Finished Blaine. Really, he had to be thankful for having such a good first boyfriend.

"That's really nice" said Kurt, and Blaine could see he meant it too. "So… who was the other? Or was it more than one?" Blaine looked at him uncertainly. It was one thing to talk about a proper boyfriend, but something completely different to talk about… flings. Blaine wasn't too proud of those, but he wasn't going to lie.

"There was this boy at a party the next year… I was kind of drunk and… yeah…" said Blaine lamely. Kurt face didn't show a lot, so he couldn't tell if it bothered him or not. It probably did. "I think his name was Sean. Maybe. But yeah… don't remember much of it. It's wasn't really a big deal, but it made me uncomfortable for days afterwards, so I guess it made me learn I wasn't one for one-night stands."

He expected Kurt to say something, but the boy just bit his own lip, like he was thinking hard about it. Should he had lied? Tell him it was only Mathew? But he preferred Kurt knowing all about him. Accepting him with the good and bad, just as Blaine did with him.

"Yeah, it doesn't sound much like you, having one-night stands." Was Kurt's response several seconds later. Even if it was guarded, Blaine felt relieved. He wasn't mad or anything…

"Yeah, never did that again. I mean… I hope Rachel doesn't count…" Which probably wasn't a good topic to bring up. Kurt cringed a bit. Yep, definitely not a good topic at all.

"So that's it?" Kurt asked. And Blaine just had to make a face, because he could hear in Kurt's voice that he hoped that _was _it.

"Hmm… I dated Freddy, a neighbor, for a couple of weeks, but then he decided he wasn't gay anymore, so yeah… hurt a bit." Kurt looked at him with understanding eyes. "It didn't go that far with him, though. Then… well, I did hook up with a couple of guys in some party or another, but it was just that… I mean, just having fun, right? And then…" Blaine hesitated and blushed a bit, and just like that Kurt's face was all serious, as if waiting for bad news. But it wasn't like he'd done something wrong… "then there was Keanu. He was the last one".

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Keanu? Like Keanu Reeves?"

"That's the same thing I said when he told me his name" said Blaine, and he had to smile at the memory. "Turns out Keanu is a really popular name in Hawaii. _Specially _after Keanu Reeves." The mood was a bit lighter with that, and Blaine just hoped Kurt would drop the whole subject.

"And… do I want to know about Keanu?" Asked Kurt uncertainly. Damn, luck was not on his side.

"It wasn't such a big deal. Just kind of… a fling, when I went to Hawaii with my parents last summer. It was fun, but, you know, just the summer." Said Blaine looking a bit to the floor.

"So why are you embarrassed?" Asked Kurt a bit dryly. "Was it a one-night stand?"

"No… it wasn't like that" said Blaine defensibly. "But it didn't last long either, 'cause I was there just nine days. So I can't quite say it was a _relationship_, but… yeah, we spent a lot of time together."

And by 'spending time' Blaine meant 'had sex'. Not that he had to say it bluntly to Kurt. Actually, better if his boyfriend hadn't got that one…

Kurt looked at him for several minutes, making Blaine wonder if the conversation was over. "I take it you weren't playing chess?" He asked finally, and Blaine just had to blush. How could he tell his boyfriend that it had being like, the hottest affair ever (nothing compared with what he shared with Kurt, of course, but still…) and that after the third night in Hawaii he had sheared Keanu's bed every day? And night. Several times.

"Kurt… it seriously wasn't such a big deal. We were both single and well… just had a good time. We both knew it was just a couple of days, and… it sort of happened, you know?" He couldn't tell if what he said was helping or not. Would Kurt be upset because he slept with someone he barely knew? Or because he thought Blaine may have developed feelings since he hesitated to talk about it?

Truth was he wasn't sorry at all for that summer fling. It had been a blur of lust and fun and touches and hot and Blaine had learned more in those five days he spent with Keanu than in all his past experiences. He was confident he was a good lover ever since and damn it, he panted at the very idea of what he could do to Kurt thanks to it. What he could do _with_ him. How he could make him feel, if Kurt ever let him…

Stop it, this is not the time to think about that.

"You're not mad about it, are you?" Asked Blaine after he saw Kurt was too deep in thought to say anything.

Kurt sighed and massaged his own temples before answering in a tired voice. "I can't be mad at something you did before I even met you. That would be pretty irrational, wouldn't it?" He said, and Blaine smiled relieved, even if he could see Kurt was not completely comfortable with the whole thing. Blaine wasn't either, but this kind of questions would have come up eventually.

"I love _you_ now, just so you remember…" said Blaine in a soft voice. Kurt smiled a little at that, and Blaine gained more confidence. "I don't know if you could say I have a lot of experience… probably not. But none of them have made me feel the way I feel with you. So… it's a bit like a first time foe me too, you know? I feel butterflies in my stomach every single time we kiss, and feel so giddy and lightheaded about it you would think I'm some 13 year old girl dealing with her first crush." By the end of his little speech Kurt was fully smiling, and the awkwardness was all gone, thank god.

"Aren't you a charmer" said Kurt trying to be reprimanding and failing. He took Blaine's hand back in his own, looking at them while he entangled their fingers. "Sorry about that… I just couldn't stop wondering and… I had to ask." He looked a bit embarrassed too.

"It's ok, I said you could ask anything." Said Blaine, comfortable on being back to safe waters. "Besides, I really want us to be completely open with each other. What with communication being the most important thing in a relationship and all."

"Yeah… thanks for telling me. Hope I didn't make you uncomfortable" Said Kurt, looking more relaxed.

"Well, you kind of did, so I fully expect compensation… a kiss would be in order."

Kurt smiled widely, and leaned into him, closing his eyes. Blaine kept his open a little longer so he could watch him before their lips met. He just loved the way Kurt's face relaxed when expecting a kiss, eyes closed, like he trusted him with everything he was. It made Blaine feel all kinds of powerful.

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><p><strong>AN:** Sorry if it doesn't show where this story is going yet. I do have a plot, I promise. Please review if you like.


	2. Chapter 2

"Shhh! My dad is upstairs!" They were supposed to be quiet, but they couldn't stop laughing about every little thing. Kurt hushed Blaine again, but he burst into giggles himself a second after, and Blaine followed. Kurt grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into his basement room. Blaine had to wonder how they managed to go down the stairs without breaking their necks.

You would think they were drunk.

But they were very much sober. They hadn't even tried Coach Sylvester's punch, never mind it apparently never got spiced up. They were just… giddy. Somehow, the night turned out to be better than expected.

Or not quite. Blaine wouldn't have minded to skip the whole Prom Queen business because seriously, Kurt deserved much better than being the end of such a hurtful prank. But his boyfriend had endured it with his head held high, and got Blaine to finally being able to stand up and confront the bullies. Never mind they weren't actually _his_ bullies, he felt strong anyways. He had been with Kurt when he needed him without caring what other people would think.

Ok, so it wasn't his school and he wouldn't be the one to confront it every day afterwards, but it still counted, right?

Besides, Kurt's face while they danced together was totally worth it.

So all in all, that night had had a turn for the better. They overcame a crappy moment together, they were now stronger and closer because of it, and the whole thing in itself had liberated them into this happy, giddy state. Blaine and Kurt danced together until the very last song in Prom, laughed with their friends all night, and now were back home, where they just kept stealing small kisses and saying whatever random thing came to their minds before bursting into laughter. Sure, any other day those things wouldn't be that funny, or funny at all, but right now everything was awesome and hilarious and _perfect_. Despite everything, the night had been perfect.

They stumbled into Kurt's bed, Kurt falling rather on top of him, trembling with giggles. Blaine looked at him with a smile of his lips. Seriously, he had the best boyfriend ever. He sometimes wondered if he should be happy or annoyed that nobody else seemed to see the plain beauty he saw… Especially when Kurt looked back directly at him, a smile in his eyes more than on his lips.

"Hey" Kurt whispered, and Blaine felt goose bumps all along his skin at that simple gesture. Suddenly he was very much aware of his quiet surroundings, of the lean boy on top of him, of his pink, slightly parted lips.

"Hey" Answered Blaine with a barely audible voice.

"Thank you for tonight. It was lovely." Said Kurt in the same small voice, and Blaine felt his heart start to hammer his chest.

"Don't thank me. You where half of the loveliness" said Blaine with a grin. Kurt grinned back, and Blaine just had to kiss him right then. He just had to. He buried one of his hands in his boyfriend's hair (now that the night was over, he could mess it up all he wanted) and pulled him down, making their lips touch lightly at first. Just a peck, then another. Then Blaine pulled a little harder and the kiss deepened. That giddy, jumpy feeling he felt before morphed into something else, something hot, suffocating and intoxicating. Blaine couldn't get enough of it.

It was like having lava running through his veins instead of blood.

He needed Kurt closer. Oh god, he needed him so much closer… Blaine moved his free hand to Kurt's back and pulled harder, getting a shot of pleasure just at the feeling of Kurt's body heavier on him. They broke the kiss off for a few seconds, both looking into each other's eyes. He couldn't believe how easily Kurt turned him into a shuddering mess.

Kurt caressed his cheek softly, lowering his head to kiss him again, and Blaine's desire came back at full force. He kissed Kurt hungrily, running his tongue deeply into his mouth, and marveled at the small, content sound he got from Kurt.

Without thinking Blaine turned over letting Kurt fall on the mattress, and it was his turn to lay down on top of him, drunk at the feeling of their bodies so close, amazed by the tingle in his fingers that asked for more. Touch more. Kiss more. Take more. Blaine moved from Kurt's mouth to his neck, kissing and inhaling deeply so he'd never forget the smell, the taste, the feeling. He allowed himself to bite just a little in the place where Kurt's neck met his shoulder and the gasp the got as a reaction made him want this so much more. He needed to hear that sound again. To know it was him who made it happen.

He let his hands wander, all the while pushing little kisses along Kurt's neck. His hands caressed Kurt's arms, shoulders, sides, and found the gem of shirt. Not that he was pulling it… the shirt was already ruffled and a small patch of skin was uncovered for him to touch, and he just couldn't help himself. There was just so much of Kurt he had yet to discover…

"Wait… Blaine, wait…" he heard in the middle of his pleasure-induced drunkenness, and stopped immediately. He unwillingly parted from Kurt's neck to look him in the eye, and just like that drunkenness was gone. Kurt was panting and blushing, yes, but he also looked uncertain and just… overwhelmed. Blaine mentally slapped himself.

"I got too carried away, didn't I?" Asked Blaine a bit fearfully, and Kurt bit his lip. The next second Blaine was already standing. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry Kurt, I shouldn't have… I didn't mean to…" He said, feeling like an idiot. He couldn't even control himself.

"No, Blaine… it's ok, really. You didn't do anything wrong." He said, grabbing Blaine's arm so he could pull him to the bed again. Blaine sat next to his boyfriend, somehow feeling like he was about to be punished by his mother for getting a bad grade on school. Except it was worst because damn it, this was Kurt. He was supposed to be taking care of him.

"I just… I should have stopped before. I should have checked that you were confortable with this…" said Blaine.

"Hey, is not like you were forcing me or anything… it just got to be a little too much and…" Kurt gulped. "I just… Blaine, I don't think I'm ready yet." His boyfriend said, looking to the ground. "Just… give me a little bit more time…"

Blaine widened his eyes in surprise. Kurt looked almost as ashamed as he felt. "Kurt… of course you're not ready. I wouldn't expect you to. I mean… We haven't been together that long and… of course we have to wait. I wasn't expecting to… I mean, not now, obviously, I wasn't expecting to go that far now."

"I really do like the way you make me feel." Assured Kurt. Like he had to explain anything... "Really, but I… I don't know how to follow you… that far. You know? I… not now. So just-"

"Kurt, we're not doing anything you're not comfortable with. You can just tell me. Is not like I will get mad or anything… I'm the one who was out of line… I should have made sure you were ok with this. I know you've never done it before. I just got carried away because…" Blaine blushed a bit. "Because I really like you. But we will take things at whatever pace you're comfortable with."

Kurt had the smallest smile on his lips, but he was still weary. "I know you wouldn't push me to anything. It's just that… I felt like such a baby sometimes. Like I'm making a big deal out of something that should be simple. I mean… I like you a lot too."

It was a bit endearing. Kurt was just trying so hard to do everything right… It made Blaine feel worst for being such a hormonal bastard.

"Kurt, it _is_ a big deal. Of course it is. It would surprise me more if you just brush it off as if it didn't matter. I mean… you just don't jump into intimacy like you're supposed to know everything about it and have it done with. It's something important. It's is important to me, and all the more because you are the person I'm shearing it with." He said, looking for Kurt's eyes and trying to give him the assurance he knew his boyfriend needed.

Kurt's smile grew a bit wider. Just a bit. "I really don't want to screw things up" answered Kurt, and Blaine's heart melted a littler. Kurt was really fucking adorable.

"We'll go as slow as you need. And if I get ahead of myself… I mean, I'll really try not to, but if I do, you just need to tell me and that'll be it. I'm not going to get mad about it." Assured Blaine. He sort of wanted to say 'I'll wait as long as it takes', but that would seem like he assumed they'd eventually do it. And he really wanted them to, but as a couple they were fairly new, and he didn't want to take anything for granted. Especially because Kurt meant so much to him right now.

"Thank you." Said Kurt, his eyes full of emotions. Blaine smiled at him, and took one if his hands to hold tightly.

"You don't have to thank me."

They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, the rooming growing strangely cold. Or it may be that Blaine felt a bit too self-conscious.

"Well, isn't it just a great way to spoil a perfectly good Prom night…" commented Kurt trying to sound normal, but Blaine could hear the undertone to it. Kurt was still weary.

"You know, I still have some time before I have to get back home so… what about cuddles?" Asked Blaine off-handedly. Kurt looked at him with a real smile this time, and the room suddenly didn't feel that cold anymore.

"Sure." He said, moving a little closer.

It was a bit awkward at first, he had to admit. Because even if Kurt's body fitted as perfectly into his as always, he was a bit too careful about touching him only in safe places. But then Kurt sort of… sighed and allowed himself to melt into Blaine, and it just became natural to take his hand, to caress his back lightly, to inhale deeply into his hair, to plant small, sweet kisses on his cheeks and lips, and wonder how could he ever feel awkward about touching this boy.

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><p><strong>AN:** It's just a bit frustrating the amount of reviews this fic got compared to the amount alert mails and favourites. I would really appreciate it if you guys tell me what you think so far. Writing people in intimacy is rather different than writing them on "normal" situations, so I'm not sure if their personalities are coming out right. I gave Blaine some more experience than he supposedly has on the show, but apart from that I'd like them keep the as close to cannon as possible, so please tell me if you think I'm doing it right... and if not, I'd also like to know what you think should change.

**Next Chapter:** The boys finally say "I love you" to each other, but how does that affect them behind closed doors?


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm sorry this chapter took so long. I had a hell of a test to study for, and then actually failed said test, so I was in a crappy mood. Also the chapter just wouldn't come out, so I had to change some things... but it turned out longer than I expected, so that's good, right?**

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><p>"I love you." Said Blaine. He really couldn't help it. He'd been thinking about it for some time, but he hadn't actually decided to tell Kurt. It just came out, and while he said it, he realized it was so, so very true, he didn't regret it. It's just how he felt.<p>

"I love you too." Said Kurt, looking almost too surprised to talk. But then he smiled, and Blaine was sure his boyfriend was glad about it.

More than glad. They spent the day together, and Kurt was walking on sunshine. He couldn't describe it any other way. He smiled the whole time, laughed at every small reason, and remained so beautifully carefree, Blaine's heart swelled in emotion. He would never get tired of saying it, Kurt was _adorable_.

Blaine guessed he himself was acting pretty much the same way. Just looking at him made his stomach flutter, and he couldn't stop grinning like an idiot. At some point that afternoon, he realized his jaw actually hurt from grinning so much, and had to wonder if that had ever happened to him before… probably not.

Then again, things with Kurt always felt new and exciting, so he shouldn't be surprised.

Everything at the time seemed brighter. Coffee tasted better, their hands fitted even more perfectly than before when they took a walk at the mall, and somehow Kurt managed to look even more gorgeous in that black vest he bought… It took all his might to just take his eyes off him enough to drive them safely home.

"Would you stay for dinner? I'm sure my dad and Carole won't mind." asked Kurt hopeful. The Hummel-Hudson household was already used to Blaine's presence among them. He had dinner with them at least once a week, and even Burt seemed to have warmed up to him. Blaine didn't know if he was more happy or relieved about that. Burt wasn't someone you wanted on your wrong side.

"I'd love to." Blaine smiled like they'd done the whole day, and they walked hand in hand into the house.

He was surprised to see Rachel on the living room with Finn. Kurt had tried to explain to him about their relationship (since Blaine never got to see any of it first hand), but apparently the status of those two changed so often, even Kurt couldn't keep up.

"Well, someone's glowing today." Said Rachel just at the sight of them. Blaine could sense Kurt blushing a bit (_adorable)_, but he just gave a cocky grin. He felt like shouting right there than he loved Kurt and Kurt loved him back, but didn't because… well, Kurt was more of a reserved person. He liked to keep things private. Unlike Blaine, who wore his feelings in his face most of the time.

"It's a beautiful day." Replied Blaine easily, seating on the couch and pulling Kurt at his side.

"To that I have to agree. The sun is just shining across the sky, the weather is perfect, but _Finn_ here doesn't want to even go out because he can't miss one single game, can't he?" Huffed Rachel, glaring at his… boyfriend? Or something. Blaine didn't feel like finding out any time soon.

"This decides who goes to the semi-final. Is not just any game." Said Finn, barely taking his eyes off the screen. "And you said we could watch the game today since we did that singing rehearsal yesterday."

"Well, yes, I did say that. But it doesn't mean I can't appreciate a lovely day and the way fellow couples get to enjoy it while we let our lives run in front of the television." Said Rachel, her voice annoyed.

"Is dad upstairs?" Asked Kurt.

"Said he'd be here for the second half of the game. He's bringing dinner too." Said Finn.

Kurt looked thoughtful for a second, but then stood up, pulling Blaine with him.

"We'll be in my room." They made a quick exit. Blaine barely had time to see Rachel's wink at him before getting dragged up the stairs.

They reached Kurt's room fast enough, since Kurt was practically running. When they got there, Kurt closed the door behind them and actually locked it. That was totally against Burt's rules of 'no closed doors when alone with significant others' to both Kurt and Finn, but Blaine wasn't going to point it out. Kurt knew well enough.

"My, aren't we on a hurry…" exclaimed Blaine, although he smiled at Kurt with a knowing wink. He sat on the bed, and waited for Kurt to join him.

"Well, I was thinking about calling my dad to remind him to buy a healthy dinner, but decided against it in favor of some alone time with you." Said Kurt, walking slowly towards the bed. He looked almost… predatory. Blaine's blood started to boil. "Is not much, but if I'm correct, we have about thirty-five minutes until the second half of the game. Whatever we're going to do with that time?"

It was just like Kurt, to be able to turn such a perfect day into something even better.

"I think we can come up with something…" said Blaine, waiting expectantly on the bed. Part of him wanted to jump Kurt immediately, but he made himself wait. He wanted Kurt to lead the pace. It was always safer that way, seeing what Kurt felt comfortable with and then going along with it. That way he didn't risk pushing things without meaning to.

Never mind sometimes it was pure torture. And call him a masochist, but he _loved_ it. Every single second of it.

Like the way Kurt slowly reached the bed, eyes dark while looking at him up and down. Or the way he sort of straddled him, pushing him to the bed with the weight of his own body, and just laid there, looking at him in the eye like trying to decide if he wanted to actually do something or just wanted to lay together forever. Then apparently deciding he indeed wanted to do something, because Blaine's mouth found itself full of Kurt. Lips and tongue and oh my god, whenever he said this boy didn't know how to be sexy?

Blaine's mind almost overloaded because really, Kurt wasn't usually this forward. Yes, he liked to be playful and to hold him as close as he could and kiss him an inch from his life, but he wasn't usually this… seductive.

Blaine was used to slow kisses and whispered words and the whole moment to be build up second by second, getting warmer and warmer until Kurt would stop leading and Blaine knew that was as far as they could get right then. They would keep exploring around it for a bit and then let it die down, both of them happy to just hold each other afterwards for as long as they could. It had been like that ever since Blaine realized he would push Kurt if he wasn't careful.

But this… from the moment Kurt started to kiss him, Blaine knew it was different. Apparently speaking the love they felt out loud broke some kind of restrain in his boyfriend, because suddenly he was all over, touching him in a way that would easily drive Blaine to the edge. He couldn't tell if there was anything actually _new_ to what they were doing. One of them was on top of the other pretty often when they made out. There was always this kind of pressure, and their hands where pretty used to wander on the other's body, playing with clothing just to find a way into bare skin, and then turning to play with said skin instead. But this time, Kurt's hands didn't hesitate. They didn't wander around; they went straight past his shirt, rubbing his sides and his back slowly and deeply. When they started to scratch his skin, Blaine had to suppress a whimper, too busy keeping up with Kurt's lips on his.

Kurt seemed possessed. And as much as Blaine loved this new side of his boyfriend and how it would help developing their relationship, things where getting too intense too quickly.

They separated to get some air, Blaine panting heavily. Kurt didn't lose any time, and started attacking his neck. There were none of Kurt's slow, experimenting kisses. His mouth and tongue started sucking into his skin, releasing him for a second only to bite at it later. Blaine gasped loudly, turning his head surprised, but Kurt only used one of his hands to turn Blaine's head to the other side, exposing his neck again. He then resumed his biting, each bite getting slightly stronger than the previous, and Blaine could swear he was starting to see stars. He felt completely at Kurt's mercy, and things in his pants where getting terribly hard. He really didn't know how long he would be able to keep this up.

But he tried. He valiantly tried, kissing Kurt back when his mouth turned to his again, holding into Kurt's back although his hands were shaking, and trying not to make it painfully obvious how hard he was. Because he knew this advances didn't mean they would all the way, and he didn't want to look desperate when his boyfriend finally called everything off. It made him wonder how Kurt could behave like this without actually wanting to go farther. Didn't his body long for it so desperately that it hurt? Didn't he become so aroused he was afraid his mind would shut down and his instincts would take over?

But just then Kurt had decided to start playing with one of his nipples under his shirt, and that was it. That was as much as he could take without starting to rip Kurt's clothes off. Blaine moaned, but held his hands out, effectively stopping Kurt from his ministrations. He actually needed several seconds to regain control.

"I'm sorry… I can't go on… sorry." Said Blaine when he was finally able to talk. Kurt looked at him rather put out, his face flushed.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked, but luckily his voice didn't sound hurt. He sounded more curious than anything else. Maybe because they were getting used to talk about intimate things, which Blaine was really grateful for. Enduring the awkwardness of those talks at the beginning of their relationship was finally paying off.

"You're doing things too right." Answered Blaine with an apologetic smile. "I love how you're feeling more comfortable about being together, but there's only so much I can bear without…" Blaine blushed. Which probably didn't show much because he was pretty red already. "You know."

Ok, so things where still a little awkward.

"Oh." Said Kurt. He blushed a bit too, which in turn calmed Blaine. "I'm sorry, I didn't want to make things hard for you." He said, biting his lip.

"Don't be ridiculous, babe. I can call it off whenever it gets to be too much, just like you can, and see? I did, and we stopped. So nothing wrong happened." Well, he _was_ going to need some more time to cool off if he planned to have dinner with his boyfriend's parents, but that was a small price to pay for having Kurt like that.

And yes, each of them had entirely different reasons for calling things off, but Blaine was pretty sure every couple had this sort of agreements and interactions.

"I just… today was so amazing… I couldn't stop thinking about how perfect you are and… and you're _mine_." He accented the word and it made Blaine feel his blood burn again. He'd never thought about it like that, but he felt pretty content right now about being Kurt's. "And I guess… I guess I just wanted to feel it. I'm sorry if I made things difficult. I don't want to come out like… like a tease, you know?" Kurt blushed again, and Blaine couldn't help himself. He just started laughing.

"You're not doing anything wrong." Said Blaine when he finally managed to stop laughing. "You're just getting used to all of this. It's normal. And we have all the time in the world. Because since you _love_ me, you can't get away from me too easily." That got Kurt to laugh, and Blaine followed suit. He loved that things could get so comfortable between them.

"I really love you." Said Kurt after a while. They were laying in the bed, and Blaine was finally cooling off enough to be presentable.

"I know. I really love you too." Said Blaine, smiling.

"No, I mean… seriously love you."

"I know." Replied Blaine, now frowning a bit. He sat up, and looked at Kurt. He stared back nervously.

"Just… don't think I don't. Because… because of all this." Kurt made a general motion with his arms, indicating both of them and the bed, and Blaine finally understood.

"Oh Kurt." Blaine smiled sweetly, and laid down again, running a hand on Kurt's waist. "I know. Of course I know. It doesn't matter. We have to get there at our own time."

Kurt smiled back. He looked like he wanted to say something, but then just didn't. Blaine wanted to ask about it, because he didn't want any confusions in this, but a loud voice from down the stairs interrupted them.

"Kurt! Are you in your room? I brought dinner!" Kurt bolted from the bed at his dad's voice, running to open the door before he could tell it was closed. Luckily, Burt just kept shouting from the living room.

"We're coming, dad!" Kurt shouted back.

"Um, Kurt? I think we have a problem." Said Blaine, who was now standing in front of the mirror. Luckily he had thought of looking at his reflection before going downstairs.

"What? What is it?" Asked Kurt, but upon turning to his boyfriend, he himself could see what he was talking about.

The left side of Blaine's neck was almost completely covered in dark red marks, all traces of Kurt's insistent biting. Well, Blaine had enjoyed those bites very much, and he was enjoying the horrified expression Kurt was giving him, so he decided he rather liked hickeys. Just another interesting fact about their relationship to make a mental note about.

"Doesn't it look lovely? I think Santana would be very proud." Said Blaine with a smirk.

"Oh god, my dad can't see those! Oh god oh god… a scarf! We need a scarf!" Kurt started to panic, looking inside his closet. Blaine couldn't help but have fun with it.

"We're on summer already. And wouldn't it look suspicious if I just used one of your scarfs in the middle of summer? Really, Kurt, this is why you were never a good spy." Teased Blaine.

"Why are you enjoying this? Do you want my dad to kill you?" Asked Kurt, who was now searching frantically on one of his drawers. He finally pulled out a small jar, and walked towards him.

"Hey, I'm the one with bite marks all over my neck. It's very obvious I didn't do them myself. And you don't have any." He moved his head so Kurt could apply whatever make-up he was using on him. He thought about asking why Kurt had make-up anyways, probably joke about him needing it to use with other guys, but thought against it. Kurt already was a lovely red flame.

"You could have stopped me, you know?" muttered Kurt with a bit of resentment.

"You looked like you were having a lot of fun." Stated Blaine, and Kurt actually managed to blush more.

"Shut up" said Kurt, finishing his work and giving it one last look. Blaine looked at himself in the mirror, and surely, all the red marks were covered. Kurt was as brilliant with this as with anything else.

"Kurt! Dinner!" Shouted Burt again. Kurt bolted. Again.

"Coming!" He shouted back, took one of Blaine's hands to start running down the stairs with him.

"Just so you know, I had a lot of fun too." Blaine whispered to Kurt before they entered the kitchen, knowing without having to look that his words made his boyfriend blush all over again.

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><p><strong>AN: This was supposed to be more angsty, but turned out like this instead. That means next chapter will have to be longer to contain what didn't happen here, but as a reader, I know you guys wont mind, will you? **

**Even so, I don't think it'll take be that long to write it, so hopefully we'll have another update this weekend. Show your enthusiasm with a review.**

**Next chapter: Blaine invites Kurt to stay over. Kurt misunderstands what that entails. **


	4. Chapter 4

"Sweet Jesus…" whispered Blaine against Kurt's neck. It was impossibly hot, not only around them but also in between them, and Blaine almost felt like he was suffocating.

The laundry room. Blaine actually had Kurt pinned in a terribly small space between the wall and the laundry machine, in this awfully hot, damp, soap-smelling dark room. But as uncharacteristic as it may seem the place had got them so riled up, Blaine could barely breathe. Maybe it was the quietness in there, maybe the fact that they could be found at any moment or maybe that they were in his house. Kurt was _finally_ meeting his house, and what better way to get to know a room than kissing your boyfriend's brains out in it?

He had nothing against beds, really. He positively liked beds. But right now, it felt like they had been missing so much because of them. Like the way he could press himself harder into Kurt's body, making it hard for both of them to breathe but also getting more friction. The small corner Blaine had Kurt pressed into made it virtually impossible for the other boy to move and Blaine felt like staying like that forever, taking Kurt's breaths away from his lips. Who needed air anyways?

There wasn't much room for his hands to wander, so he set one on Kurt's waist, his other hand running up and down his boyfriend's hip. He came close to his ass in each run, but never quite got to it. And damn it, he really wanted a grab. Kurt had an amazing ass, which was still off limits for him. And was it pushing it too much to take the chance? Of course he had been trying to follow his lead in intimacy, but Kurt was much more comfortable with touching now. He initiated things more often, tried to explore deeper, and was it really wrong of him to move forward a bit too? These things were supposed to go both ways.

So he decided to try it out. He deepened the kiss as if to get Kurt's mind distracted, and while rubbing his boyfriend's thigh he let his hand wander a little more, his fingers slightly touching his ass before pulling away. Kurt didn't seem to mind, so Blaine did it again, this time with a more forward touch. He let his hand linger a while before departing again. He felt and small squeak from Kurt, but then he kept kissing back, and Blaine took that as a green light. More sure of himself, he let his hand go directly down Kurt's back, grabbing surely into his butt, and yes, it was just as amazing as he thought it would be. He felt Kurt giving a little groan, and then stop the kiss. They didn't move.

"Enjoying yourself?" Asked Kurt panting, with a raised eyebrow and a playful smirk. Blaine's hand was still secured in Kurt's ass, and even though he was blushing and felt like a boy caught with his hands in the cookie jar, he didn't feel like letting go any time soon. It had taken long enough to get there.

"Very much, if you must know" said Blaine with a big smile. If he'd know Kurt was comfortable with this little step, he would have done it much, much sooner.

"Well, I'm glad for you, but you should let go now. This place's lack of glamour is getting to me. You have a beautiful house, and you start attacking me in the less appealing room? I really rather go on with the house tour." Said Kurt. And although Blaine was thankful he was taking things lightly, he knew pretty well what Kurt meant. He was overstepping, he needed to slow down.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay a while longer?" Asked Blaine, but Kurt's face was all he needed as an answer. "Ok, but we're continuing this talk later". He smirked, finally releasing his hand off Kurt, and moved away to start fixing his clothes. He was wearing just some loose jeans and a shirt, so there wasn't much to fix.

Kurt did the same, and soon they were ready to head out.

Hand in hand, they went back to the kitchen, through which you got to the laundry room. It was large and clean, and Kurt already liked the idea of cooking with more space than he usually had back home. He had offered to make breakfast for Blaine's family the next day, saying he had the best recipe for pancakes.

Oh yeah, Kurt was staying the night.

Blaine's skin started to tickle. It was going to be amazing. There was something about having Kurt in his room, in _his bed_, together late at night when everything else was quiet that made Blaine's mind shudder. He supposed it was because most of his memories with him happened in Kurt's own room, and Blaine wanted his chance too. His mother had prepared the guest room for Kurt, but he was pretty sure they could spend a couple of hours together before they had to go to separate beds. Who knew? Maybe he could even convince Kurt to stay the night with him. They could go mess up with the sheets in the other room before his parent got up next morning and they didn't have to know nobody slept there. Yeah, it was a good plan. Sleeping with Kurt, being able to pull him close and snuggle the whole night. To think he'd had that chance a couple of months ago and he had wasted it by getting drunk on Rachel's party… he was still embarrassed about that.

"So, did you have anything planned for the afternoon?" asked Kurt. The house tour was now finished, and they still had a couple of hours until Blaine's parents got home.

"I have a bunch of movies, but Nate is playing videogames. Don't think he'll be too amused if I ask him to leave." Said Blaine, talking about his little brother. He was 13, and he was kind of an ass. Blaine knew there was a moment between those early years when every boy was an ass, but somehow it felt his brother was a bigger one. He had been pretty much unbearable this summer. And as much as Blaine wanted Kurt to get to know his parents like he was getting to know Burt and Carole, he didn't want him to have a hard time with his brother.

"He doesn't really like me, does he?" asked Kurt with a frown.

"He doesn't like anyone. I think it's one of those phases. He'll grow out of it, hopefully." Replied Blaine. "Tell you what, why don't we have a walk around the neighborhood? I can show you my elementary school. And maybe we'll have the TV for ourselves when we get back."

"Sounds good." Blaine smiled while the walked out of the house. His boyfriend wasn't really picky with what they did when they were together. It seemed that as long as he had a reason to walk with their hands entwined, he didn't mind anything else (except on shopping dates, but that was a whole different matter). Those rather innocent notions of romance were another fact he loved about Kurt.

"So, Nathan…" said Kurt once they were out of the house. "I know you don't like to talk about it, but I take he's not too happy with… you and me being together?"

Blaine huffed. He figured they'd have to talk about it sooner or later.

"I think he didn't take seriously me being gay until I actually acted on it." Said Blaine, trying to end the topic soon. He didn't want Kurt to be uncomfortable. "I mean, I told my parents when I was about his age, and he found out soon after. But since we go to different schools and all, he didn't have to _see_ it until I started dating you. And I think the friends he hangs out with now aren't very accepting either, because he's been more hostile since he's friends with them. I just try to look the other way. He's young and he'll soon learn to know better."

Kurt sent him a reassuring smile. "I'm sure he'll come around."

They walked around for another hour, Blaine pointing at every relevant place of his childhood. The park he used to play in, school and the candy shop he and his friends used to raid every time they had money. They bought some gummy bears (which Blaine knew Kurt secretly loved), and walked back home. The TV was indeed free when they did, so they popped in Finding Nemo, Blaine snuggling in Kurt's chest while his boyfriend played with his hair. He loved to feel Kurt's laugh in his body every time Dory said something particularly amusing. It was Kurt's favorite character.

Dinner was uneventful. Blaine's parents where as good as he could have hoped for, even though he knew his dad wasn't very comfortable with the situation. He had been the reason why it had taken him so long to bring Kurt home, but he managed well, staying on safe topics in conversation and probably pretending Kurt was just his son's friend. It hurt a bit, but Blaine knew that was the best he could hope for on the time being. His mother had an easier time, delighted to talk with Kurt about the house decorations and food recipes. Even though she worked a lot and didn't have much time to cook, she still liked to treat her family with great dinners.

Nate was… he was himself, really. He hadn't say anything directly against Kurt, which Blaine was grateful for (he suspected his mother had something to do with this too), but he didn't try to make Kurt comfortable either. He would send this hateful looks at his boyfriend, and Blaine knew Kurt could see them, but was doing his best to ignore. Well, for a first dinner, things could have gone much worst.

Blaine finally relaxed when both his dad and Nate excused themselves from the table. Kurt insisted on helping his mom with the dishes, so they moved to the kitchen, talking amicably while Blaine brewed coffee. If anything else, his mom and Kurt were striking a good friendship, which was really what he wanted the most.

"Well boys, I think I'll go to bed now." Said his mom after finishing her coffee. "Kurt, darling, the guest room is prepared for you. There are towel in the bathroom if you want to take a shower too."

"Thanks Ms. Anderson." He murmured. Blaine could tell Kurt was relieved it was finally over.

"Call me Tania, darling." She began to walk away. "But if you'd rather spend the night with Blaine, that's fine too." She said, before she exited the kitchen. There was a knowing smirk on her face. "I trust you'll keep it quiet since the house is full of people, but I know you'll want to take advantage of your time together. No need to mess the guest bed just to please us if you don't actually use it. It's less work for me if I don't have to tidy it up tomorrow. Good night boys."

She left without turning. She probably knew they'd both be completely red. It made Blaine wonder why mothers always seemed to know what was going on in your head.

He peaked at Kurt, who was looking at the floor, blushing furiously. Blaine didn't know if his mother was smoothing thing for him or actually crumpling them more.

"She's sometimes a bit forward like that." Said Blaine scratching his head. "But she's just trying to make you feel comfortable."

They stayed in silence, Kurt still looking to the floor. Shit. He was nervous. Blaine sighed.

"Do you want to watch another movie?" he asked, trying to fill the silence. "Or go to my room? We could listen to some music and chat or… whatever you want." Said Blaine, realizing a second too late his offer sounded double-meaning. He blushed. That wasn't a good way to make Kurt comfortable again.

"Yeah, let's go to your room." Said Kurt in an uncertain voice. Blaine just led the way, trying to find something to make things normal again. He couldn't believe they had been together four months already and they still had these awkward moments.

Blaine decided to play some music, just to avoid any kind of silence. Not too loud, since his parents were in the room down the hall, but enough for them to have some noise around.

"Do you like my room? Be honest. I know you have high standards." Blaine asked, trying to make some conversation. Kurt sat on the bed, looking around.

"It's very you, if that makes sense. If you see it in general it looks tidy, but a closer look makes you realize it's a bit of a mess." Said Kurt with a small smile. "I like the blue color on the walls though."

"I'll take that as the weirdest compliment I ever got." That got a smile from Kurt, which finally broke the ice. "Hey, I may regret this later, but do you want to get a peek on my wardrobe? I always wanted to know what you'd say about my clothes."

"Really?" asked Kurt, eyes wide. Blaine relished on his eagerness. He nodded. Kurt was up in a jump, going straight to the closet. He opened each door in turn, going through every bit of clothing Blaine owned. Blaine laughed at every comment about his clothes being quaint and picturesque. This translated in his mind as 'you really need some new clothes'.

Forty minutes later, Kurt rejoined him on the bed, a huge smile on his face. "Ok, so your closet is becoming my next summer project. There's a lot of misused space in there, and whites and colors are mixed all over. I'll arrange it in a simple, pattern-and-color system that worked perfectly for me until I had to include feathers into the scheme."

"Yeah, that won't become a problem." Said Blaine with a snort.

"Of course not. It's a look few people can pull off." Kurt smiled cockily. Blaine wanted to bite that smile off. So he did. He kissed Kurt with a sudden movement that surprised him enough to get him paralyzed for a second. Blaine laughed softly at Kurt's reaction, but stopped five seconds later, when he realized Kurt was still unmoving.

"Kurt? What's going on?" he asked, his voice concerned. When he looked at Kurt's face, he pulled out completely, frowning.

"Nothing. Nothing's going on." Said Kurt a little too quickly. He was wearing his I-want-to-look-normal-but-I'm-completely-freaked-out face. Still, he reached out to Blaine, trying to kiss him again. Blaine pulled him off.

"It's not nothing. You look like you'd rather run away right now. What is it? Did I do something?" asked Blaine feeling a bit annoyed. He'd do anything for Kurt to feel comfortable with him, but it was really hard when Kurt shut down like this…

"No. You didn't do anything. It's ok Blaine. Really. I just want to be here with you, that's all." He said, moving closer again. His lips were back on Blaine's in a second, moving against them. Blaine's started letting himself melt into the kiss, when he felt one of Kurt's hand shaking. It was barely there, but Blaine knew Kurt well, knew his body language, and there was something wrong with this.

"Ok, stop. Stop now." Commanded Blaine. Kurt widened his eyes, but he looked nervous again. Blaine sighed. What happened? He knew this was Kurt nervous about them being together, but everything had seemed so right in the afternoon on the laundry room... Kurt had been comfortable, hadn't he? Now somehow the boy who feared having the sex appeal of a baby penguin was in front of him again. "Is this because of what my mom said? Because she was very tactless and I know you don't like that kind of forwardness, so I'm really sorry if it made you uncomfortable." It was the first think that occurred him could be the reason.

"It doesn't have anything to do with her. I'm fine" repeated Kurt.

"Then it _was_ me." Blaine turned worried. "Is it because of this afternoon? I was going too fast again?"

"You didn't do anything wrong Blaine!" exclaimed Kurt exasperated. "There's nothing wrong. Stop reading so much into things."

"I would if you stopped lying and tell me what's going on!"

"I can't!" chocked Kurt. He breathed deeply as if trying to calm himself, but Blaine could tell he was close to tears. It made him regret his behavior. "I thought I was ready, but I can't. I'm sorry." Finished Kurt sadly, looking at his hands.

It took Blaine about five seconds to understand Kurt's meaning behind his words. Then he took another five to curse internally.

"Kurt, I've told you nothing you don't want has to happen. It still stands." He tried to explain slowly. He didn't even understand why they were back at this again. Had he pushed without realizing?

"I know, but it all has been going so well this past time… and you inviting me to stay over and… I thought I could be ready if I tried." Said Kurt embarrassed.

"Did… did you think I invited you so we could have sex?" asked Blaine disbelievingly, not sure if he should be upset with Kurt or with himself for not making things more clear. Kurt turned a deep shade of red.

"I know you're not pushing things, Blaine. I told you, you didn't do anything wrong. It's me. I know I'm getting to be ridiculously slow in this and… and you've been so patient. Is not fair for you." Kurt was biting his lips like he did every time he tried not to cry.

"I'll say it one more time and I hope it's clear. I don't want to do anything you're not comfortable with, Kurt. I love you. I can wait. I told you it was fine, I…" Blaine started to feel a little desperate. "Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you." Answered Kurt with vehemence in his voice.

"Then why don't you believe me when I say I'll wait?"

"Because you shouldn't have to!" Replied Kurt. He sounded a bit mad, but Blaine got the feeling he was mad at himself. "And… I can tell things are getting intense and sometimes… sometimes you have a hard time stopping when I ask and… it makes me feel bad. It shouldn't be like that. You shouldn't have to go through it. So if you're trying so hard, then I should try hard too, right?" he looked like he needed confirmation, and Blaine sighed. Kurt would probably take to heart whatever he said next, and how could he explain that he was right and wrong at the same time?

"What each of us is… dealing with, is not the same, Kurt. I don't know what it _looks_ like when I have a hard time stopping," Blaine blushed furiously. He probably looked embarrassingly desperate, if Kurt was getting such a conclusions out of it… "but it doesn't hurt me." Not in the real sense of the word, at least. Not in a way that mattered. "If you push yourself into something you're not ready, that _would_ hurt you. And _I_ wouldn't be able to live with myself if I was part of that, so by taking your time, you're taking care of both of us."

Kurt's lower lip wavered. Then Kurt was hugging Blaine for dear life.

"I'm sorry… you're always so nice in this things and I… I'm really sorry…" Blaine would have never imagined he'd have to comfort Kurt in a situation like this. He wouldn't have even imagined that couples had this sort of problems. Yes, it was natural to want to touch the person you loved, to feel them close, to have them in a special way. But sometimes it was so much more complex than that. While being intimate, the most little things turned out to have huge meanings and huge impacts, as well as a huge power to hurt the other person. It was a bit scary. Kurt trusted him, and Blaine could only hope he was leading things the right way for both of them.

"Shush, stop apologizing over this. Everything will be fine."

They hugged for a long time, Kurt calming himself. After a while, he broke the silence again, with a bittersweet smile on his lips. "I keep turning our special nights awkward."

Blaine smiled endearingly.

"It doesn't have to be." Answered Blaine. After a bit of thought, he asked slowly. "Would you stay the night? We wouldn't do anything. Just… sleep with me?"

Kurt smiled and nodded. Things started feeling better already.

They took turns on the bathroom to change clothes, turned off the lights, and went to bed. They didn't talk, just leaned in closer to each other, their breaths matching perfectly. It took them both a long time to fall sleep, but Blaine enjoyed having Kurt this close, even though he felt too self-conscious to hold him.

The next day, Blaine woke up to find their bodies had fixed that problem on their own. Kurt was sleeping on his shoulder, one of his hands holding tightly to Blaine's shirt, while his own hand was loosely wrapped around Kurt's waist. He felt even better when Kurt woke up ten minutes later, smiled at him, and leaned in for a soft kiss that didn't feel awkward at all.

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><p><strong>AN: I know I said this would be ready before. Sorry. Didn't work out. This fics is in general much harder to write than I thought. I always wonder if Blaine's feelings and thoughts come across as I try them to, so yeah... tell me what do you think.**

**Also, it took me longer to update because I started a new fic that wouldn't leave my mind alone. It's called "Don't dare me to breathe", and has already been posted, so check my profile if you have the time. It's different from this one, done in Kurt's point of view, and it's flowing really well, in my opinion. For some reason it's much easier to write than this one...**

**Thoughts and opinions? Don't forget to review. **

**Next Chapter: The Rachel Berry House Party Train Wreck Extravaganza 2.0. Which plays awfully similar to the last one: Blaine gets drunk, and then screws up.**


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm sorry for the enormous delay. But you know, life happened. Sorry.**

**Anyway, I'm kind of nervous about posting this chapter. Just... if Blaine seems OOC, remember he's drunk. **

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><p>He felt a deja-vu, going downstairs to Rachel's basement along with Kurt and Finn. Although Rachel wasn't wearing a hideous dress… Well, it was still a dress, and still rather childish, but the black color of it was thousand times better than the green one she wore last time.<p>

There were a couple more people apart from Glee club. Apparently some kids from singing camp (which Rachel had just arrived from), who seemed not to be terribly hostile. Except from the boy wearing a disco shirt and platforms, who was just awkward.

Still, the party was fun. Jokes were told, laughs were had, music was singed and danced to, and Blaine made sure to stay at Kurt's side all the time. They hadn't exactly discussed it, but Blaine could remember the fiasco of the last party at Rachel's, and he wanted to do everything in his power to learn from his mistakes. Blaine could see Kurt was also making pointedly sure to be close at all times, and he catched him eying Rachel a bit spitefully now and then.

Rachel was too busy making out with Finn. Even to realize Puck had once again broken into the liquor cabinet and was passing drinks around.

"Here, super queer drinks for you guys. They're actually _pink_." Said Puck a bit later to Kurt and Blaine, realizing none of them were drinking anything. He handled them too bottles with a _very_ colorful beverage.

"Thanks, I'm not drinking." Declined Blaine immediately. Better safe than sorry.

"Aw, c'mon dude! Kurt, your man is no fun. I know Finn is designated driver, so there's no need to be so prissy."

Kurt actually laughed. Blaine was surprised. His boyfriend hadn't declined the drink, although he smelled it with a doubtful expression. Then he seemed surprised. "Smells like cherry." Kurt loved cherry.

"Well, go on then. Teach prep boy here how to be a little more loosed" encouraged Puck. Kurt just shrugged and took a sip.

"A bit too sweet, but it's kind of good." He admitted.

"Good, we have at least one fun gay dude around. Learn from him, prep boy." Said Puck, and wondered off to offer drinks to other people. Blaine looked mildly amused while Kurt took another small sip."

"I'm kind of surprised. You didn't drink at all last time…" said Blaine, although he didn't really want to talk about last time.

"I had my reasons. This time I decided I could be a little more relaxed, having you with me." Replied Kurt, a smile dancing on his lips.

"Really? Now I'm curious. What changed?"

Kurt blushed a bit, but answered anyway. "I was kind of trying to impress you. Thought it would be sloppy to let you see me drunk. Wouldn't do any good for the fabulous appearance I was trying to keep up."

Blaine blushed in turn. Out of embarrassment, really, because he had been kind of a jerk on that party, and it was worst to learn Kurt had been trying to impress _him_. It mortified him to admit he hadn't really paid any attention to Kurt that night.

"Sorry. I was an idiot." Said Blaine. Kurt nodded but smiled contently.

"It's in the past now. You know, you don't have to be too self-conscious about it. I mean, senior year is coming up and I expect we'd go together to a party or two. I won't get mad if you have a drink. Unless you have to drive, of course."

"Really?" Asked Blaine. Not that Kurt wasn't an understanding boyfriend or anything, but it kind of surprised him.

"Yeah. Try it. It gets even better after the first sip or two."

It was true. And the drink was actually really good. And Blaine was kind of thirsty, so he downed most of it in a matter of seconds. Kurt just laughed at him, drinking from his bottle in turn. They both finished them quickly, and soon Kurt was on his feet, dancing to the Lady Gaga song that started to play.

Must have been because of all the fun they were having, dancing and drinking and joking and kissing here and there, that Blaine didn't notice how much he actually drank. One moment Kurt was handing him another bottle full of pink liquid with a huge smirk, and next time he knew it, he had drank that bottle, another two more, and had accepted a tequila shot when Santana offered. He felt that happy-silly-floaty drunk feeling in his body, and started to laugh at everything. He could tell Kurt was a little drunk too because he was talking way too loudly to Mercedes about the disgrace of polyester. Right then, Blaine decided it was time to stop, because one of them had to be at least a bit sober to carry the other if they needed to.

That was, of course, until Santana insisted he took another tequila shot. This time though, he had to lick the salt from Kurt's neck, and then take the lemon from his lips. And how the hell would he ever say no to that?

He wasn't sure if he drank anything else afterwards, but he was already more drunk than he cared to admit. And the next second Kurt was pushing him up the stairs, giggling like idiots, while an amused Finn followed. They were going home.

They had to drop Mercedes on the way, but still the ride was very short. Blaine and Kurt spent it all murmuring very loud on each other's ears. Just silly, inside jokes that for some reason were all the more funny right now. Finn just rolled his eyes, and followed them with his eyes while they walked to the house.

Blaine walked to the stairs, using what small lucidity he had to try and be quiet. He heard Kurt and Finn talking in whispered voices, then Kurt joining him on the stairs, while Finn looked at them with a funny face. Kurt just ignored him, pulling Blaine with him to his room. The force Kurt used told Blaine his boyfriend was a lot less drunk than him, even if he was all silly and giggly.

Blaine's bag was already at Kurt's room, so Blaine found easily his PJs while Kurt was on the bathroom. He changed right there in the middle of the room, his drunken mind thinking that hell, he was getting naked in Kurt's room, and wasn't that just hot? What would Kurt think about it? What would he say if he came back from the bathroom and Blaine was waiting for him naked in the middle of his room?

But it didn't happen. Because sooner than expected he had his PJs on and Kurt was still elsewhere. It rather disappointed him, even when deep down a voice started to tell him to be careful and not push things.

So he waited. Kurt was back several minutes later, claiming he had cut short his moisturizing routine as much as he could. Blaine took the bathroom then, took a pee, brushed his teeth, and was soon back in the bedroom, were Kurt was already tucked in his bed, waiting for him.

That was definitely a sight he could get used to.

Part of his body wanted to jump Kurt. A stronger part, thank god, made him act like a decent human. He closed the door silently, turned off the lights, and tucked into bed next to Kurt, his blurry mind trying to give itself speech after speech of why he had to keep his hands to himself.

But really, it was all Kurt's fault. Even if his boyfriend just wanted a good-night kiss, he complied when Blaine turned it to a heavy make-out session. So you see, Blaine couldn't be blamed, when his skin burned like it did, for rather pinning Kurt down and kissing him passionately. Kurt was his boyfriend, and he loved him, and love was a healthy thing. And Kurt was sexy as hell. So really, what other thing could he have done?

Both Blaine and Kurt were panting heavily, Blaine trying to pull Kurt closer in the middle of their kisses. Kurt, even if he was kissing back, tried to remain at safe distance. Which didn't bother Blaine because all he had to do was distract him in order to gain more access. He did it all the time. He would just have to be a bit more bold now.

Blaine straddled Kurt, still kissing him hardly, and after a couple of seconds started to grid into him, feeling a shudder crossing his body from head to toe. He heard a loud gasp from Kurt, who turned immobile. He tried it again, tasting the waters, and god it felt good.

But Kurt didn't move. He was sort of paralyzed. And part of Blaine's drunken mind told him that Kurt not moving meant he agreed to more, that he agreed to have Blaine touching him, that he surely wanted it as much as Blaine did. And god, Blaine wanted him bad. It was driving him crazy, and it was like his lower body had a mind of its own and wouldn't be too happy if his hardness wasn't dealt with.

The other part of his mind was too busy being worried if he was royally screwing up. Had he taken things too far? He had taken things too far. Good thing his sensible side (which was the one that knew by instinct that Blaine loved Kurt way too much to harm him) won, and Blaine separated from his boyfriend, letting himself drop at Kurt's side without actually touching him, heart pounding, face flushed, cock still hard.

He felt his mind drowsy, his eyelids heavy. Kurt was gasping for air at his side, rising to a sitting position, and in Blaine's mind that was prove enough that his boyfriend was at the very least alive and fine, and that information would have to be enough until Blaine had the energy and lucidity to even think about something else. He knew, somewhere inside him, that he had made a huge mistake. He just didn't feel like dealing with it at the moment.

Kurt was looking at him. Blaine's eyes where barely open, but he could make out Kurt's shape in the darkness, and he could feel his gaze. And he should feel embarrassed. He should feel ashamed beyond words about this.

But truth was, he was still very hard. Even the idea of Kurt _looking_ at him was arousing. Because then Kurt would see what he did to him. What he kept causing over and over and, before his mind could register anything else, a hand, his own had, was inside his pants and around his cock, pumping slowly.

Oh dear god.

His whole self was a shuddering mess. He closed his eyes tightly, started moaning at his own hands, biting his lower lip a fastening his rhythm because _Kurt would be looking_, and then maybe he'd understand how fucking hard this was for Blaine, and how he had, he absolutely had to forgive him when he got a little out of control. Because couldn't he see how crazy he drove him? Blaine felt this mind darkening, and he was barely able to stay awake and what little strength he had was used to keep pumping and it was probably against the law of nature to feel so tired and so aroused at the same time, and there was the feeling of warm skin laying at his side and it felt really nice even if it wasn't actually touching his skin and then suddenly it _was_ touching his skin, and not only the skin on his side, there was also a warm hand travelling down his belly, into his pajama pants, subtly and a bit unsurely joining Blaine's own ministrations.

He shivered. It took him several seconds to realize that second hand wasn't his own, and the only other person it could belong to was Kurt, and holly mother of god, Kurt was touching him.

The shiver shook his whole body this time. _Kurt was fucking touching him._

That knowledge drove him to the edge. With a small cry, Blaine felt his whole body exploding, waves of pleasure rolling on him, dying down slowly, and taking with it the little strength he had left. And then, his mind shut down.

* * *

><p>Even before opening his eyes, Blaine could feel the sickness in his stomach, and the dizziness in his head. Damn it, his head. Hurt like hell. He rolled over, his body complaining at every movement, and Blaine pressed his head into the pillow, trying to avoid the light in his eyes. Could someone turn off the fucking lights?<p>

Settling his head back in the pillow, he marveled at its softness. Which was a bit weird because his pillows didn't have this soft, velvety feeling to them.

Slowly, Blaine opened his eyes, and looking around he recognized the fashion posters and drawing at the wall. Kurt's bedroom.

Oh god. Not again.

It wasn't the spinning of the walls that bothered him. It was the fact he was FUCKING HANGOVERED IN HIS BOYFRIEND'S BED. Again. He had made a fool of himself at Rachel's party again. God, would he ever get things right?

Blaine rolled on the sheets, trying to get up. Kurt was nowhere to be seen, and Blaine wondered if he had something to apologize for. Other than getting drunk, that is.

And right then, the night's events came crashing down to his memory. Blaine kissing Kurt, Blaine pinning Kurt down, Blaine getting off of Kurt, Blaine…

Oh shit.

Oh shit, oh shit oh _shit_.

Blaine's eyes were now fully opened, scanning the room around him. Kurt was, in fact, gone, and that left a dready feeling in Blaine. Why had he left? Was he mad? Of course he was mad! Blaine had practically molested him last night! He had… he had almost _forced_ his boyfriend to…

Oh god, he was going to be sick.

He made a mad dash to the bathroom, thanking god for not running into anyone in the way. Luckily, he was able to get there before he emptied his stomach, feeling disgusted not only at the action but plainly at himself. Oh _god_. What had he done?

He fell to the floor, a couple of tears on his eyes, completely freaking out. He had royally screwed up this time. Kurt could dump him for it, and he'd probably be right. So much for trying to take things slow and _respect_ his boyfriend, all it took was a bit of booze and all his morals went to hell. Without being able to stop himself, Blaine punched the floor in anger. He was so totally screwed.

Still, he couldn't leave without a fight, could he? He really hadn't mean to… oh god, he felt mortified only to remember it. He didn't mean to… push Kurt. Much less to… what? Being insolent? How did you say 'I didn't mean to wank in your bed, _in front of you_, without actually saying it? God, something like that just _had_ to happen with Kurt, didn't it? His rather impressionable boyfriend who he happened to love. Well, he'd do anything to not lose Kurt. If he had to beg for his forgiveness, so be it.

So the plan was to find Kurt, determine how mad he actually was, and then start begging with due necessity.

Blaine got up, but just at starting at himself on the mirror, he could tell he wouldn't get Kurt forgiveness if the showed up like this. His hair was a mess, he smelled, and had drool marks all over his face. Gross. Ok, new plan, he would get a shower and look presentable, and _then_ he'd find Kurt and beg for forgiveness.

Blaine walked back to the room in search for his bag of clothes. He found it at the side of the night stand, discovering also, neatly laid in said night stand, a glass of water and a tablet of aspirins. Blaine looked at them like they would jump and bite him any minute.

Kurt was the only person who could have left that for him. Which meant… which _probably_ meant that maybe, just maybe, Kurt didn't hate him. Maybe he wasn't as mad as he thought he'd be about the whole thing. Maybe… maybe Kurt had already forgiven him? After all, Blaine _was_ drunk. He hadn't meant to… do that. And now that he remembered, it was Kurt who had suggested Blaine should drink last night. Not that it made feel Blaine any less than an asshole, but hey, if it helped to not get dumped, he was all for it.

Feeling better and more hopeful, Blaine swallowed two aspirins with the glass of water, and walked to the bathroom again. He took a short shower, cleaning all the tiredness in his body and rehearsing apologies on his head. _Baby, I'm so sorry. You know I would never try to hurt you._ Kurt did love it whenever Blaine called him 'baby'. _I love you. Please forgive me, I didn't mean to do it._ Or maybe accepting his stupidity from then beginning? _I know I screwed up and I'm an idiot and I probably don't deserve it, but please give me a chance to make it up to you. I'm so sorry… I love you so much, please forgive me. _Yeah, something along those lines… Kurt would at least hear him out, right?

Fresh from a bath and clean clothes, Blaine felt hundred times better. He also thought he had a better chance at convincing Kurt if he could use his charm a bit… his insides twisted. Oh god. Kurt had to forgive him. If he didn't, Blaine felt he could literally die of sorrow.

He left the bathroom and dumped his bag back into Kurt's room, took a deep breath and started walking towards the first floor. _This is it, Anderson. Courage! _And all his courage died the second the crossed Burt Hummel on the stairs.

Well, crap.

"Hey kid, good to see you're finally up." Said Burt. Ok, he didn't look murderous and wasn't holding any weapon, so probably he wasn't going to kill him. That meant he knew nothing about last night. "Bet yah have one hell of a hangover…"

"Good morning… eeer, I feel fine…" answered Blaine, turning completely red. It wasn't a good thing either if he knew Blaine was drunk last night. Wasn't he supposed to make a good impression on his father's boyfriend?

Maybe that chance went to hell the first time he spent the night drunk in his bed.

"You know, Blaine, you're a good boy. And since you're dating my kid, I can deal with you spending a few nights here. But it wouldn't hurt if you happened to be sober for them." Said Burt. Blaine felt like dying of embarrassment right there, but then he realized Burt had a smirk on his face. Ok, so it was probably good-natured teasing, although he guessed Burt meant it too.

"I'm really sorry. It's never going to happen again" Mumbled Blaine, looking to the floor.

"Relax kiddo. I was your age once too. I know how it is." He said, patting Blaine's back and walking past him. "Kurt's got breakfast in the kitchen. Go eat something." He said before disappearing in his room.

Blaine stared going down the stair, thinking a mile per minute. Ok, so that had been horribly awkward and embarrassing, but he had more important issues at hand. Namely, if Burt was alright, it meant Kurt wasn't angry. Because angry Kurt equals angry Burt. Besides, Kurt had done breakfast? The boy did cook all the time, but never when he was in a bad mood, so maybe…?

When Blaine entered the kitchen, the sight that met him stunned him for a couple of seconds. Not because there was anything terrible, but because everything seemed to be fine. What the hell?

Kurt was making pancakes on the stove, humming softly to himself while doing it. Finn was on the table, swallowing enormous chunks of food. Carole sat there too, reading the paper while sipping some coffee. A perfect family breakfast.

But where was angry Kurt? His boyfriend could never fake it when he was mad, and he had every right to be. Why wasn't him?

"Oh, you're up. I was about to go get you. Sit on the table and I'll give you some of these. Special recipe. You'll love them." Said Kurt with a nice smile. He looked… fine.

Had he dreamed it or something?

Blaine just followed his instructions, sitting down and starting to eat as soon as he had food on his plate, always wondering what was going on. Had he imagined it? Because he knew Kurt and there was no way he could be acting so normal and carefree after what Blaine had done last night. No way.

"Blaine, sweetheart, are you feeling all right?" Asked Carole, waking Blaine up from his thoughts. "You're so silent…"

"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't even say good morning, did I? I'm sorry. Good morning. Kurt, this tastes amazing." He said, remembering his manners. He actually hadn't paid any attention to the taste (and he had already finished the food) but he was pretty sure it _was_ amazing. Kurt's cooking always was.

Kurt rolled his eyes, but smiled at him.

"Why, thank you. Good to see you returning to the land of the living." He said.

"Dude, he was like… a mess last night. No wonder he feels like crap." Finn said. Blaine blushed, and Kurt stared at Finn, who just realized he had said that in front of his mother. "Sorry. I mean… eerrr… is good you're fine."

Luckily, Carole didn't say anything. Blaine would have probably died of shame if she did, especially after what Burt had said.

"I feel fine." Was all Blaine managed to say. He was embarrassed and confused and really, wasn't Kurt mad at him? "But I think I'll go lay down a bit more. Thanks for breakfast, it was delicious." He said, trying his best to smile at Kurt, and getting up.

"Call us if you don't feel good!" Was the last thing he heard from Carole before he practically run to Kurt's bedroom.

Oh right, it just made him remember what he did. He was _sure_ it wasn't a dream.

"Blaine? Are you sure you feel alright?" Kurt asked from the door, with a preoccupied voice. Blaine turned around to see him, and felt like a right asshole all over again.

"I'm fine. I just… Kurt… I'm so sorry, I… oh god…" Blaine fell seated on the bed, rubbing his eyes. He wasn't crying, but he realized he was still tired from last night.

"Why? What happened?" Asked Kurt, sitting at his side, worried. Blaine looked at him, a bit shocked.

"What do you mean, what happened? You know what happened. You weren't that drunk. _I_ was the one who was totally smashed and made a right fool of myself." He said spitefully, feeling disgusted at himself. "Kurt, I don't completely remember what happened, but I know… god… I know I was…" He looked at the door, making sure there wasn't anybody there, and lowered his voice. "I know I kind of… pushed you. A lot. I just… I can remember you not moving, and me not stopping and… you probably hated me right then. And then I finally got off of you, but I couldn't stop and… god, I feel like the worst boyfriend ever… I'm so sorry…"

He would be lying if he said he didn't have tears in his eyes. He was trying really hard to hold them because he didn't want to look more pathetic.

"Oh, Blaine…" whispered Kurt, pulling Blaine close and holding him. "That's what you were worrying about?"

"You say it like it's nothing." Mumbled Blaine, feeling confused again. "I know you. The way you are with these things, there's no way it didn't bother you."

"Well, I kind of lead you on a bit too, didn't I? Blaine, I was rather drunk too. And yeah, things got a bit out of hand, but you did stop. I mean… I can't get mad about that."

"I would never hurt you. I'd never force you." Insisted Blaine. He needed Kurt to know he respected him, no matter what had happened.

"I know. Of course I know, silly." Said Kurt with a smile. Blaine pulled apart to see his expression, and found he was being honest. He breathed in relief. So things where ok? Oh wait, there was still…

"And about what happened, you know, after. I'm sorry… I feel really embarrassed about it. I mean, we're supposed to be taking it slow, and you didn't need too… see _that_". Said Blaine, wondering just now exactly how much Kurt had seen.

There was a small silence, while Kurt turned a deep shade of red. He had made his boyfriend feel awkward. Just perfect.

"Yeah… well… it was kind of hot."

Wait. What?

"What?" asked Blaine dumbfounded. Kurt turned even more red.

"You're not going to make me say it again, are you?" mumbled Kurt. But Blaine was still speechless. "Blaine, you're good looking, ok? And… well, you looked… god Blaine, you looked gorgeous."

Blaine was pretty sure his brain had just exploded.

So Kurt… had liked it?

"You don't remember it?" Asked Kurt. He was looking at the floor, his voice small.

"It's kind of blurry. I just remember not being able to stop and then… then…" Blaine's eyes opened like dinner plates. Just when he thought he couldn't possibly be more surprised that day. "Oh god, then I couldn't stop because you… I mean I just _felt_ it, but I knew it was you and…" a shiver run down his back.

Kurt had touched him. It had been exhilarating. How had he forgotten? How could he ever forget being touched by his very attractive boyfriend? He had been dreaming about it for _ages_, and last night he had gotten it (kind of), and he didn't remember?

Such a cruel world.

"Yeah." Was all Kurt say. Ok, this was awkward. And as stomach-flipping as the notion of being touched by Kurt was, he hated that it had happened like that. Blaine wanted every step they gave to be consented and meaningful. Not a drunken night of hornyness.

It was official. He was NEVER drinking again.

And yet, it was a step forward, wasn't it? Kurt had done it on his own will (plus a bit of alcohol), and although he was awkward, he didn't seem to regret it.

It wasn't ideal, but it could be just a little push in the right direction.

"So you're not mad?" Asked Blaine, breaking the silence.

"Of course not." Kurt turned to him and smiled a small but reassuring smile. It was almost a bit… coy. Blaine's stomach fluttered.

Well, who was he to question small (and awkward and bizarre) miracles when they came by? If Kurt wasn't upset, Blaine could let it slide and just make sure it never happened again. He smiled.

"I love you." He said, hoping that would summarize _I'm sorry it won't happen again I really didn't mean to and I'll make up for it and thank you for being so amazing._

Apparently Kurt got the message because he just smiled back, and leaned in to kiss him softly.

* * *

><p><strong>So. If you people want me to get some normal sleep, please comment and tell me if it wasn't all too... I don't know. Something that Blaine would do? Although in the show he *does* get... sloppy. Sometimes.<strong>

**Also, I realized Kurt may also look a bit OOC in *not* freaking out about what happened. Well, the reason may come clear in future chapters, but even so I think I'll include a Kurt interlude later on so you can see what he thinks and why he's doing things the way he is.**

**Review? Pretty please with happy-drunk Blaine on top? *winks***

**Next Chapter: While in intimacy, the smallest mistakes or carelessness can hurt people beyond words. Sadly, Blaine learns this the hard way.**


	6. Chapter 6

**This chapter is kind of where the fic has been going from the beginning. And I'm actually really nervous posting it. Don't know if what I'm trying to convey actually goes through... Still, here it is. Hope you enjoy it.**

* * *

><p>The end of the summer was approaching fast, and all Blaine wanted was to spend it with Kurt. He wasn't really sure what to do for his senior year. Kurt had hinted about him transferring to McKinley more than a couple of times, and he sort of wanted to, but he also loved Dalton. He had a lot of friends in there (even though Wes and David had graduated last year), and the Warblers were like his family.<p>

Still, he had time to make that decision.

Right now, while he drove to Kurt's house on a hot and clear day, his thoughts about Kurt focused on an entirely different matter. Namely, the fact that they would be spending that day together. Alone. In Kurt's house, which could potentially turn into Kurt's bedroom, or more specifically, Kurt's bed. Not that he was counting on it, of course.

It's just Kurt had been so much at ease with him the last couple of weeks. After the whole Rachel's party disaster, Blaine thought it would make Kurt uncomfortable and hesitant to initiate things. But if anything, things had gone the other way around. Kurt seamed bolder, calmer, and Blaine felt like he even enjoyed what they did more. Things seemed to build up swifter, and even though Kurt never quite let him touch him below the waist (although Blaine managed to grab his ass a couple of times more), he was pretty confortable if it was him who did the touching. They hadn't gone as far as that drunken night again, but they were getting close. Actually, Kurt was getting close, but Blaine was fine with it because he knew Kurt just needed to get used to it, and he would be allowed to touch his boyfriend back as much as he wanted once he was ready.

At the rate things had been going... well, Blaine couldn't deny thinking that maybe, _maybe_ the reason Kurt had invited him today, specifying their solitude in the house, had something to do with it. Kurt's tone on the phone had been playful, and, well, as much as Blaine wanted to give Kurt time, he also wanted, like, REALLY wanted to be with him.

It wasn't just a physical thing. Yes, his body was getting restless, but it was so much more than that. He was so in love with Kurt, it sometimes hurt to not have a real way to show him. Sure, he could say it, and try and convey his words in how he acted toward him, even the way he looked at him. But Blaine wanted more… he wanted to touch him like he was the most precious thing in the world, and he wanted to make his skin burn alive, and he wanted to be gentle and soothing and intense and passionate at the same time, and he wanted to have Kurt's first time because he knew he could show him what love was. He was sure he could show just how much he cared, how much it meant to him.

He wanted to make love with Kurt. He knew what sex was, and he could and couldn't at the same time imagine how it would be to do it with someone you actually loved…

He was also desperate to feel Kurt loving him back.

But if today didn't turn out that way, it was ok too. Blaine could wait. He would wait forever. This meant so much, it would be stupid it to rush it. Besides, he knew Kurt had really high standards about what he wanted. He always aimed for perfection. And of course, whenever it happened, Blaine wanted it to be as perfect as Kurt could wish for.

Blaine parked in front of Kurt's house, walking the now familiar path to his front door. He loved it that he already felt almost at home here. Kurt's family was amazing, the house was really nice, and more importantly, it was the place where Kurt lived. He couldn't but love it here.

"Door's open!" He heard Kurt's voice from inside after his knock. Blaine entered the house looking for his boyfriend. "I'm in the kitchen! Brownies are almost done!"

Blaine walked in to find Kurt in an apron, checking the oven where a platter full of brownies resided. The sight was pretty adorable.

"Hey there" greeted Blaine once Kurt left the oven, grabbing him by the waist and pulling until they fell into a confortable kiss. They were both smiling, and Blaine couldn't help thinking they were kind of perfect together.

"Nice to see you." Replied Kurt a little blushed. "So, food's almost ready, and I have lots of iced tea in the fridge. I was thinking a marathon on Toy Story would be perfect. I just got the third movie on DVD.

Blaine smiled warmly. Ok, so he'd been reading too much into things. That was fine. He refused to be disappointed or anything. Time spent with Kurt, whatever they did, was very much worth it.

"Sounds great. But if I end up crying on your shoulder, you're not allowed to make fun of me." Said Blaine.

"I'll be the first to cry. The first tears will probably come as early as the first movie. That part where all the toys refuse to help Woody always kind of broke my heart."

Kurt filled a dish with brownies and Blaine helped carry two glasses and a jar on iced tea before they made their way to Kurt's room. The DVD boxes were already out, and Blaine was happy that at least, being in Kurt's room meant they could cuddle all they wanted without having to worry about someone walking on them before they heard them coming. He also knew they could get their fair share of making out, and really, it was enough for him.

They lied on the bed together, tangling their legs. Being smaller, Blaine rested his head in Kurt's chest, content to feel his heartbeat while the movie started. Kurt would play with his hair or caress his back, always having some kind of contact. On the parts of the movie that weren't so interesting, Blaine would trace a hand along Kurt's chest and belly, or lay small kisses on his neck. Kurt's breath would halt, but return to normal shortly after.

When the movie got to the part where Woody is refused by his friends, a few tears did drop from Kurt's eyes. Blaine felt his chest shiver a bit, and seeing Kurt cry a bit like that was so terribly beautiful, he couldn't help but start kissing him right then to make it better. Kurt let him distract him from the movie, deepening the kiss while he pulled Blaine to lie on top of him, making their bodies touch at length.

There was something different about this. Blaine could tell from the beginning. There was a heavy intensity between them that made their kisses sweeter and stronger at the same time. Blaine took Kurt's face in his hands, hardly believing someone so perfect could be with him like this. He turned from Kurt's lips to travel slowly towards his neck, sucking and biting gently, knowing that too much pressure would immediately leave mark in Kurt's pale skin. A small shudder shook Kurt's body, and Blaine relished the small moan that escaped his lips.

They kissed for a long time, tangling their legs together while their hands travelled each other's bodies. In the background, Blaine could hear the movie coming to an end, then the credits rolling in, then the DVD stopping, but they kept kissing and exploring each other.

Blaine's hand travelled slowly below Kurt's shirt, marveling at the softness of his skin. Did Kurt have a moisturizing routine for his whole body? Blaine scratched gently his back, getting a new moan out. Kurt, in turn, started pulling at Blaine's shirt, motioning to take it off.

Well, this was new.

Blaine complied with a smile, letting Kurt get the piece of clothing out, and allowing himself to fall when Kurt pushed him off of him, for him to be on top instead. Kurt's blue-gray eyes were deep, and Blaine felt completely naked in front of him. And as terrifying as it was, he loved it.

Kurt's moves where uncertain, but the smallest touch from his fingertips drove Blaine to the edge. Now with his shirt gone, it was no wonder he was already gasping for air. Then Kurt was kissing and _licking_ his chest, and then he had one of his nipples in his mouth, and oh my fucking god, Blaine could feel his brain exploding right then.

His mind was drowning so deeply into the sensations that Kurt created, that he could barely register when the button and fly of his pants got opened. He _did_ registered, though, when he felt Kurt's hand tantalizing his front and holly mother of god, Kurt was touching him.

With a tentative hand, Kurt was stroking him above his boxer, and Blaine's body arched at the feeling, because it was too much and not enough at the same time and his whole body was about to melt in any second.

"Relax, it's ok…" whispered Kurt in his ear, and even that sent a shudder along his body again.

"Are you sure-" started asking Blaine, trying to use what little common sense he still had to make sure his boyfriend was comfortable with this, but Kurt beat him to it.

"It's fine, Blaine, just relax." Said Kurt, and Blaine couldn't do anything but follow his advice. He was too far gone anyway.

Blaine let his body relax into the mattress, gasping loudly when Kurt's hand tugged his boxers down just a little, enough for it to get his cock out and start stroking it freely. After that, he was left incoherent of any other thought (or words) apart from 'oh god', 'fucking amazing' and 'I love you so much'.

His orgasm hit him as a strong wave, rolling him to the moon and back in a few seconds. It was so much better than he could have imagined. He held Kurt close as much as he could, trying to feel him there, trying to have their bodies become one.

When his breath became more normal, Blaine pulled apart, looking at Kurt and wondering if it would be too much to burst into tears right that second. It would probably freak Kurt out. Still, his boyfriend was smiling beautifully, and that was good enough for the moment.

"That was…" he didn't even have words for it. Blaine could just look at Kurt and think this may be the best day of his life.

"You liked it?" Asked Kurt a bit uncertainly.

"It was amazing." Answered Blaine, rolling over so Kurt could fall on the mattress. He immediately started looking for his neck, kissing him slowly. His body was still heavy and relaxed from his orgasm, but he could ignore that in favor attending Kurt. He'd been waiting far too long to have him.

"Blaine, wait." Whispered Kurt just half a minute later, when Blaine had started to unbutton his shirt. He held up his hands, and Blaine stopped immediately.

"What is it?" Asked Blaine, confused.

"I… I just think we should stop now." Said Kurt, his face turning a light shade or red. Blaine just looked at him even more confused.

"Stop? Why?" He asked, lost. Kurt wanted to stop _now_? But he'd already…

"I just… I just don't want to go that far yet." Said Kurt, pulling away.

Blaine started blankly at Kurt. For a couple of seconds, nothing made sense. He didn't even know what to say, but somehow, that glorious feeling he had been feeling the last moments was disappearing.

"That far? What do you mean, that far? You just…" Blaine motioned at himself, suddenly very aware of his state of undress and ruffled clothing. Not only that, but just now he realized Kurt was almost untouched.

"Yeah…" Kurt blushed. "I… I thought you'd like it. Didn't you like it?" He asked again, almost mumbling.

"Of course I did. But… it… Kurt, this things are supposed to go both ways." Tried to explain Blaine, but wasn't that supposed to be obvious? Shouldn't Kurt know that already?

"But I'm just… not ready yet." Said Kurt in a small voice, and Blaine felt dread all over his stomach, all those previous beautiful sensations completely gone.

"If you're not ready then why did you…?" Blaine's voice was getting rather agitated.

"I really don't mind Blaine." Kurt's voice sounded dubious, like trying to convince both himself and Blaine. "I've told you, waiting so much is not fair for you. So… I really don't mind, doing this for you. You know, until… until I'm ready."

Blaine looked disbelievingly. For a second, it was like he didn't even know the boy who was in front of him.

"Kurt that's not… that's not what I wanted at all. This… I wanted you…" He didn't even know how to explain it. It was like Kurt had got it all wrong. So _very_ wrong.

"It's fine. Is not such a big deal. I mean, I'm ok with this-"

"Yeah, I'm not." Cut Blaine before Kurt could keep explaining. "This… this is supposed to be about both of us. Together. I've been waiting all this time because… we were supposed to go at this together."

"But you don't have to wait anymore. You'll have both. We can do this for a while and then… we'll eventually get there. And it won't be that much, I promise."

"Kurt, I don't _want_ this. This… this had to be special for _us_" He repeated. "It doesn't work if it's just me-"

"But it's fine. Blaine-"

"Are you serious? Kurt, this has to be meaningful for us both. I mean… this is special for me. And I don't want it to be just me, it makes me feel awful. How would you feel if it was the other way around? If it was me who wouldn't let you touch me?" Asked Blaine, his voice getting a bit desperate. He couldn't believe Kurt didn't understand something so simple.

"It's not the same thing. You've done this in the past. Is not such a big deal for you anymore." Explained Kurt, looking convinced.

"Not a big deal? So it'd be a big deal if it was you, but it isn't because it's me?" asked Blaine, getting mad. He didn't like were this was going at all, but his own frustration made it hard for him to stop his growing anger.

"That's not what I meant." Said Kurt, his voice hardening. "But I know is not that important for you, and stopping is hard. I get that. So I'm trying to help."

"You get nothing, Kurt. How can this _not_ be important? This is not what I wanted." Replied Blaine, his voice now angry. Hadn't he explained this like a thousand of times? Weren't they clear about it already?

"Isn't it? Because your body says otherwise most of the time." Snapped Kurt, half angry and half scared. Blaine felt a pang in his chest of both guilt and resentment, because he had fought so hard with this, he couldn't believe Kurt would use it against him.

"You make me sound like I'm some kind of perv who can't wait to get in your pants." Replied Blaine, pulling completely away from Kurt and standing from the bed.

Looking at himself just made everything worst. His shirt had been discarded, his pants were open and his boxers barely covered him, trails of sticky substance still visible. He felt like he'd never been so embarrassed in his life. He must've looked pathetic. Being in such a shape, how wouldn't Kurt think he was desperate? Was he really so pitiful that Kurt had found no other way than to get him some to keep him happy?

He hated himself for it. And he hated Kurt a bit too, for making him feel like this. He stared walking towards the bathroom, looking to clean himself. He didn't want to be in such a messy shape in front of Kurt ever again.

"I didn't say that. Of course I don't think about you like that." Kurt's voice turned more conciliating. He stood after Blaine, following him, but Blaine didn't want him close anymore.

"Then what do you think Kurt? Really, what made you think I was so desperate for sex that I couldn't wait anymore? Am I really that pathetic to you?" Blaine finally got to the bathroom, closing the door behind him so Kurt couldn't follow. He felt cheated. Looking at his disheveled self in the mirror, he somehow felt taken advantage of.

Hot tears prickling his eyes, Blaine turned the water on and started cleaning himself.

"Blaine! Blaine, could you open the door!" Called Kurt from outside, knocking strongly. His voice sounded kind of desperate, but Blaine didn't care right now. "Blaine, please! Can we talk about this? You don't look pathetic at all to me, why would you? Please open the door!"

Blaine finished, listening to Kurt's pleas. He didn't say anything, but finally got out of the bathroom, walking straight to Kurt's room in search of his shirt. Kurt stood uneasy at the door, and then started following.

"Can you stop? I'm sorry, ok, I'm sorry. I did this because I thought it's what you wanted. I thought you wanted things to go a little farther and-"

"WOULD YOU STOP SAYING THAT?" shouted Blaine, his body shaking. "Stop talking like you were doing me some kind of favor. Stop saying this is what I wanted because you're wrong. I wanted…" Blaine's voice started shaking. "I wanted us to make love, ok? To… to show each other what we felt. That's what this is supposed to be about. This? This is not making love. This is me getting off because apparently I'm too desperate for it and couldn't wait and since I've done it before, it's ok for it not to mean anything, isn't it? Since I've had sex before, that makes me some kind of slut who just wants to get off, right? Who doesn't care that my boyfriend doesn't even trust me enough to take his shirt off in front of me as long as I have a good time."

Now Kurt was shaking too, his eyes filled with tears.

"No… Blaine, no, I never meant that. I just… if I'd know it bothered you so much…"

"Bother me? You talk like you step on my foot or something. Kurt, do you even know how much this meant to me? I thought it meant something for you too." Blaine found his shirt, and put it on in an aggressive move. When did the idea of being without clothes in front of Kurt became so stressful?

"It does! I like being with you! It's just… I didn't want to get us stuck in this! I didn't want for it to become a problem!"

"It IS a problem if you're doing something you're not prepared for. I mean, what made you feel you had to do this if you didn't want to? Did you think I'd dump you for not putting off?" Cried Blaine.

Kurt looked at the floor, not answering. It was only a couple of seconds, but it was enough to make Blaine understand. All of a sudden he felt like all the air had been punched out of his lungs.

"Do you really think that of me?" Asked Blaine, his voice small and hurt. "Did you think I'd…" There was a small silence. "No, you know what? Don't answer. I don't even want to know." Said Blaine, looking for his cellphone and car keys. He couldn't stay there another second.

"Wait! No, just, Blaine I didn't… I swear, I don't… Please don't go." Begged Kurt, barely able to talk in between his tears. "Let's just fix this, please?" Kurt stepped in front of the door, blocking Blaine's way. Blaine gripped his phone with strength, trying his hardest not to push Kurt. He loved this boy, damn it. He was not going to get physical with him.

Oh, great, was that pun intended, brain?

"Kurt, get out of my way." Said Blaine, trying his best not to shout anymore.

"Please, Blaine… let's just… let's just talk-"

"Kurt, let me _go_! I don't want to talk to you or be here anymore. Not while knowing you think I'd… Jesus. I can't even say it. You know what? If you think that about me and still want to be my boyfriend, then you're not the person I thought you were either. So this will get us nowhere. Now get out of my way."

Kurt attempted to talk again, but Blaine started walking. He was at least glad Kurt got out of his way when he saw he wasn't stopping, even if he hated it that Kurt followed him all the way to his car, begging and crying for him to stay.

Blaine just remained silent, getting into his car and driving away from Kurt, trying not to look at him in the back mirror. His heart was already too broken.

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><p><strong>I don't have much to say except... I'll just patiently wait to see what you guys think. Hopefully you did like it. <strong>

**If you wonder what Kurt thinks/feels about all this, I'll have a chapter for him soon.**

**Oh, and tomorrow Glee comes back! I'm guessng you're all as excited as I am. I wanted to post this today because tomorrow we may not have brain for anything else.**

**Next Chapter: Blaine is hurt, so he goes to his best friends for advice.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: A big thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. It really gave me confidence that what I wanted to say came across. It really helped me write this chapter too.**

**Also, you may have noticed that I changed my user name. That's because I got an account in Tumblr and wanted them to have the same name. I like it better too. So, if you're on Tumblr and want to follow, do check my profile.**

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><p>As early as seven in the morning, his cell phone started ringing again. Not that it would wake him up. He couldn't sleep at all last night. Blaine wondered if Kurt instinctively knew that and that's why he'd kept calling until almost three in the morning.<p>

Blaine didn't even attempt to pick up.

It was just a small comfort, to know Kurt was trying so desperately to contact him. He'd also sent texts practically begging him to answer, but Blaine ignored those too after the first six or seven. There were even a couple of unopened mails on his inbox, and for a second he wondered if he'd find messages on his Facebook or Twitter if he checked them. It was so stalking-ish that in any other situation Blaine would have found it terribly amusing.

Right now it was just terribly depressing.

What the hell had happened? Blaine's head just couldn't understand how things had come to this. Had he really pressured Kurt so much that he felt the need to do this? Was it just Kurt's inexperience playing too hard? Was it really not such a big deal and Blaine was taking it way harder than he should?

There was a bit of that, probably. But it just _hurt_. He'd tried so hard to do things right with Kurt. He'd hoped so hard for things to just… develop into something they'd both be comfortable with. Something they could look back and say "it was just natural to be together". But he'd done it all thinking about Kurt, thinking Kurt needed to be taken care of, thinking if he wasn't careful he'd unconsciously take advantage of him and then he'd never forgive himself.

It just never occurred to him that it could be Kurt the one to take advantage on him.

But was it really like that? Of course Blaine knew Kurt was just trying to please him. He just didn't understand how he could be so blind about what Blaine actually wanted. About what he expected of their relationship. Horribly as it sounded, it made Blaine wonder if Kurt actually loved him. Because Blaine remembered about having sex with people he didn't love, and that's exactly how it worked. You felt good, and if you wanted to keep doing it, you worked to get the other person content enough for it. Content enough to stay and keep making you feel good. But since you don't love them, you don't give anything more.

Was that the way Kurt saw him? Like someone he just needed to keep happy enough so he'd stay by his side? But even then, why would he do that? So he'd still have a boyfriend? So he wouldn't go back to be the only gay kid around? Did Kurt only keep Blaine at his side because he'd be lonely otherwise, so he was setting for what was available?

His phone rang again, and Blaine could barely control himself into not throwing it out the window. His jaw was clenched so hard his whole head was shaking at the pressure, and his eyes were full of tears. He'd already cried last night, but those last thoughts broke his dam again and the next second he was sobbing uncontrollably, rolling into a little ball on his bed.

He couldn't remember being so miserable ever before.

Slowly, the tears run out. The shaking subsided, and his mind was left numb. He couldn't think anymore. He knew he'd just hurt more if he kept rolling things over in his head, and every new thought would be worse than the previous, and he _knew_ Kurt cared about him and it wasn't fair to think about him like that.

He was also afraid that if he kept thinking it, he'd start believing it.

So he got up and walked straight into the shower. He turned the water as hot as he could bear, and let it wash away the pain and the exhaustion and the sorrow as well as it could. He got dressed, headed down to the kitchen, and surprised his father by asking if he could join him and his friends at golf that day.

Riding silently next to his dad, he mentally thanked him and his mom for not asking questions, even though they both knew Blaine found golf hopelessly boring and even though he was sure they both heard him cry last night. Most of all, Blaine silently thanked his dad for driving him away from his cellphone, that remained in his nightstand, ringing constantly.

Blaine tried his best to keep his head on the game, even if it was boring. At least his dad's friends were nice to talk to, all of them pleased at such a mature and dapper young man. It made him forget things a bit, get calmed and more collected, so it didn't hurt that much to see the 37 missed calls and 12 unread messages when he got back home. He deleted them all without opening them and called Kurt.

"_Blaine?"_ answered Kurt after the first ring. His voice was afraid. Blaine should have felt guilty, but he didn't.

"Hey" he said. Really, he didn't have much to say.

"_Oh Blaine… thank god… I started to think you'd never… Blaine, I'm so sorry, I really-"_

"Kurt, you need to stop calling. It isn't helping things at all." Said Blaine, trying to keep his voice calm. Which made it come out rather cold, but he did feel just cold inside out, so he couldn't help it.

Hurt as he could be, he still wasn't impervious to the sound of Kurt sobbing on the phone.

"_Blaine… I'm so sorry… I can't tell you how much… just… please Blaine, I was an idiot. I didn't understand at all but I love you and I just thought you-"_

"Don't even say it." Warned Blaine. "Whatever reason you did it, it was for yourself. You don't get to use me like that and then try to make it about me." So much for self-control, his jaw was clenched and his eyes were full of tears again.

"_I didn't use you! I love you, I'd never do anything to hurt you! I thought it was what you wanted and that time after Rachel's party you didn't mind it and things where better afterwards! So I just wanted to-"_

"I was drunk that night! I felt like an asshole afterwards but thought we could move on because, since I was _drunk, _you understood it wasn't what a wanted. I actually told you that! And do you ever listen to me when I talk? Because I lost count of how many times I told you I didn't mind waiting for you."

"_But that's not fair to you! And with how long this has been taking me-"_

"So you did it to stop feeling guilty." said Blaine. It wasn't a question. Kurt's voice wavered at the other end.

"Is not like that." He finally said. Blaine didn't believe him. Because he knew Kurt didn't believe himself either.

"Kurt, I really need you to stop calling and texting. It makes me angry and it makes me nervous." Said Blaine after several seconds of silence.

"_I… how long?_" asked Kurt with a small voice.

"I don't know… just… I'm not cutting you out completely, ok? But this… it's too much right now. I need time to think. And you need time too. Because you need to rethink these-"

"_I don't need to rethink anything. I love you."_ Pleaded Kurt. He sounded like he was starting to cry again.

"No, listen. This… this pressure you were feeling, it didn't come from me. I know I pushed a bit sometimes and I'm sorry, but…" And then the doubts stormed Blaine's head again. Was this entirely his fault? Had he somehow, unconsciously pushed Kurt into it? He shook his head. He couldn't just blame himself for the whole thing. "I was always very clear about where my intensions stood. And you didn't listen, or didn't believe me, and there has to be a reason for it. A reason you need to figure out because I can't… I won't get back if I'll have to worry all the time if you're doing whatever we do because you want it or because you think you have to."

And didn't it sound like their whole relationship was a joke? Didn't it sound like they'd been involved in some sort of passive-aggressive, unhealthy relationship from the beginning? Way to make himself feel sick.

"_Does this mean… are we… Blaine, does this mean we're not together anymore? Are we breaking up?_"

"I don't know. Are we?" asked Blaine. He truly didn't know.

Silence. Blaine waited. He could almost hear Kurt tremble on the other side.

"_I'd do anything to not lose you. Anything."_

Just then Blaine realized he'd been holding his breath. And when he breathed again, it hit him that despite everything, he desperately wanted them to stay together. Fix everything and go back to his plan of the most perfect life-long relationship with him.

"We'll just take time to think. Both of us. At least some days to…" he sighed. He didn't even know what that time was for, except thinking and trying to understand. "To cool off. Maybe then things will start to feel less like such a mess…"

Silence again. Blaine knew Kurt didn't like it much, but wasn't going to argue.

"_Ok…"_ Kurt sounded rather deep in thought.

"I'm going to hang out now." Said Blaine after a couple of seconds.

"_I love you Blaine. I'll do everything to try make things work out."_

"I know." Was all Blaine said before hanging up. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't bring himself to say I love you too.

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><p>Kurt kept at bay for four days. At fifth day Blaine received a short text. It just read "<em>I miss you<em>". Somehow, it made him feel warm and at the same time annoyed. Was it possible to have such a weird mix of feelings?

He had missed Kurt too. So very much. Soon after his decision of not wanting to see him Blaine realized he had arranged his summer around Kurt, to spend with him as much time as he could. Now, he was left bored, sad and alone at home, and he started wondering if it was a bad thing that his life had been wrapped around Kurt the last few months.

He didn't reply to the message, and Kurt didn't send any other that day. But the following, Blaine walked out of the shower to find "_Summer isn't the same without you. I love you_" on his phone. He had to smile a bit to it because yes, it was the same thing he kept thinking these days. Even so, he didn't answer.

He tried occupying his time in things that wouldn't let him think. He bought a new game for his PlayStation 3 and spent hours on it. He took several walks around the neighborhood and agreed to join a soccer game between other boys he'd been friends with when he was a kid. That had been nice. They all went for burgers after the game, and it made Blaine feel almost normal.

Still, every time he went back home the mess with his boyfriend would return to his head. He wasn't really angry anymore. He was hurt and confused. Hurt because really, apparently his boyfriend thought the worst about him and didn't trust him at all. Confused because now he kept wondering how much of what they had before, physically speaking, was real and what wasn't. What if it all was a lie and Kurt hadn't wanted any of it? He knew he wanted to forgive Kurt and go back to him, but he didn't quite know how to pick up the relationship from there. It scared him beyond words to think that maybe they wouldn't be able to.

So on Saturday, Blaine convinced his mom to let him skip aunt Nora's birthday dinner (she was old and never remembered his name anyway), and called in reinforcement. Wes and David, like good Dalton boys, where at his doorstep punctually. They called for pizza, and set to eat it at the living room, sitting on the carpet. Anyone who knew Blaine knew that the boy preferred to sit on the floor most of the time. Furniture he preferred to jump on.

It was a bit awkward, telling them what had happened. Wes and David had been his best friends for a bit more than a year now, but they had never quite talked about this sort of things. Sure, they had made comments, and they teased each other, but they had never talked about it in so much detail. Problem was, if Blaine didn't explain it well, he didn't think he could make the other two understand.

And as it usually happens, the moment he started telling the facts, he started feeling stupid. It was important in his head, but putting it into words made it feel like he was trying to make a big deal out of nothing. And he felt embarrassed about it, but kept talking anyway. In their favor, Wes and David listened until the very end and didn't make fun of him.

"So then you left?" asked Wes, seeing Blaine had stopped talking.

"Yeah. He kind of asked me to stay, but I just couldn't." Answered Blaine, biting his lip.

"And you haven't talked since then?" Asked David.

"He kept calling and calling. You know, he did apologize a lot. But it made me nervous and I kind of wanted some time alone, so I asked him to stop. I mean, I told him we weren't breaking up, but that I needed some time."

There was a silence in the room. Blaine looked at the floor, somehow feeling nervous. His friends' opinions really mattered to him a lot, and he didn't want to learn from them that maybe he had screwed up badly.

"And here I thought being gay made things easier." Commented David. Wes rolled his eyes and Blaine smiled a little at the comment.

"It _is_ more complex than I thought it'd be." Accepted Wes. Blaine had told them both in advance that Kurt and he had had a fight and he wanted some advice.

"So? What do you think?" Asked Blaine, uncertain.

"Well, I understand why you got mad. Kurt must be one of the persons who know you the most by now, and for him to believe you'd leave if he didn't do it, well, if he can't trust you in something like that, it's like he doesn't know you at all." Said Wes. Blaine grimaced, feeling a small pang in his chest at Wes' words. How much did Kurt really know him?

"Yeah, that was not cool." Said David, looking a bit nervous at Blaine before speaking again. "But Blaine, don't take this the wrong way or anything, is just that I think… I mean, is it really that much of a big deal? Not the trust thing. Wes is right about the trust thing. But the other part, you know, Kurt giving you a hand with… you know? I don't think it was really that bad. Just… helping you out. Couples do that all the time. I don't really understand why it was so bad he did it."

"I'm not against the act in itself." Started to explain Blaine. "Of course not. It's just, the moment we are in… I just wanted it to be for both of us."

"Well, yeah, but the time it takes to each person is different and stuff." Said David.

"That's why Blaine made it clear to Kurt that he'd rather wait." Intercepted Wes.

"Did you really talk about it? Like, did you tell him specifically you didn't want him to touch you until you could touch him back?" Asked David. The question sounded a bit aggressive, but Blaine knew David was just trying to understand things.

"Not in those exact words, no. I mean… I told him hundreds of times that I wanted to wait for him. I thought it was _implied_. Isn't it an understandment that couples want to reciprocate?" Said Blaine, but started feeling a horrible uncertainty in his stomach. He remembered what had happened after Rachel's party, and even though he had apologized profusely, he hadn't said he didn't want to do it again. Maybe that's why Kurt got confused? In which case, it all turns to be his fault. Shit.

"Not exactly. When I started with my first girlfriend, it kind of happened like with you and Kurt at first. And I thought it was awesome. I mean, I knew she needed her time and I wasn't going to pressure her or anything, but she knew I wanted to do stuff. So she lent a hand too, and I thought it was… well, really nice of her. She was just helping." Explained David.

"Every couple is different." Replied Wes.

"Oh come on. Don't tell me you didn't do it either, Wes. Caroline was only 15 when you started dating. And the way she is, I won't believe for a second you went straight into doing it."

"But Kurt is not a _girl_. Shouldn't they be equals?" retorted Wes.

"Don't gay couples always want to be considered the same as straight couples? So I guess it can happen." Shrugged David.

"Considered the same to other people! But inside the relationship it would be ridiculous!" snapped Wes.

"Guys! That's a little beside the point." Intervened Blaine, a bit alarmed.

"Whatever dude. All I'm saying is, your man was trying to help. Straight guys are _glad_ when that happens with their girlfriends, so why should gay guys think differently? It isn't a big deal, like, as to get offended because of it. That's unnecessarily dramatic." Finished David.

Blaine listened to David's words, feeling sick as they came out. Not a big deal… that was the same thing Kurt had said. Then it _was_ Blaine the one who had screwed up. How come so many people could think it wasn't that important when it meant so much for him? Were his feelings wrong somehow? It was worst because now he felt like he had no _right_ to be hurt, but he was. And how was he supposed to fix that?

He was so lost in his thoughts, his face consorting into the dread he was feeling, that he missed the severe look that Wes was sending in David's direction. After seeing Blaine's reaction to his words, David had regretted them immediately.

"Blaine? Don't take it hard on yourself. No matter what David says," Wes said, sending daggers into the other boy's direction. "Every couple works differently. Nobody can take for granted what it's important for someone or not."

Blaine nodded, but didn't say anything. He felt like an idiot now.

"Man, I didn't mean it like that." Said David, like trying to fix what he said before. "Maybe you overreacted a bit. But Wes is right, I didn't have the right to say it shouldn't be a big deal for you. Neither did Kurt, for that matter. He shouldn't have said that."

"He didn't exactly say that. I mean, he didn't say it shouldn't be important for me. He assumed it wasn't. You know, not as important as it would've been for him." Elaborated Blaine, although his voice was still small.

"Look, I like Kurt. And we know how he is. Well, surely you know better than us," said David pointing at himself and Wes, "but we spent a lot of time with him when he was at Dalton. And don't take this the wrong way, but he _is_ sort of… delicate. Not in a girl way or anything, but… yeah. And you were trying to be all mentor-ish for him at first, and then when you started going out you still kept that thing about looking out for him. He expects you to look out for him too. And that's cool because you're a couple and all, but like you keep saying, it should go both ways. Like, if he wants you to be careful with him, he should be careful with you too."

"But he _was_ trying to take care of me. I mean, he's always trying to help me and all. It's just this time he got it kind of wrong." Said Blaine, not sure why he was defending him.

"Kurt always had problems with… accepting he's wrong." Opined Wes. "Like, not because he's too proud… well, that too, but I think even in his head he normally doesn't second-think his notions to see if he's right or not. So I guess he got his head set in the problem being that you wanted to go farther, and nothing could change his mind. Even if you said differently."

"He _is _hard-headed like that." Agreed David.

Blaine nodded, thinking hard about his friends' words. He didn't want his boyfriend to sound bad, but that _did_ sound a bit like him. When Kurt had his head set on anything, it took something huge to make him change his mind. Which probably was what had happened here. Well, at least he hoped Kurt would understand now what Blaine wanted. They'd have to talk about it really clearly so Blaine could be sure.

And yet, once he thought about it like that, he found himself to be less mad at Kurt. Because that stubbornness of following so strongly in what he believed was something he had always admired of him. Yes, it took him to the extreme sometimes, but it was also what drove him to achieve what he wanted.

"You'll think I'm crazy, but I kind of love that about him. You know, he _is_ obstinate, but that's usually a virtue on him. I guess it just played against him this time." Blaine said, and he found himself smiling, albeit quietly. Because it made him feel better, to know that it probably wasn't that Kurt didn't trust him, it was just Kurt being _Kurt_, and he could never be mad at him for that.

"Our virtues are usually our biggest flaws too." Said Wes, smiling a bit too. Both he and David sensed Blaine lighting up, and that pleased them. Blaine was such a good guy, and they just wanted him to be happy.

There was silence for a couple of minutes. As Blaine's posture and face relaxed, their friends could see he was making pace with the whole problem in his mind. Blaine was very much an open book, and everyone who knew him could read him easily.

"We know he hurt you, dude. But it was a mistake. And Kurt's been in love with you for a long time. I can bet my life that he never meant to upset you. You know this is all new for him. He was probably trying too hard, and maybe that's why he got it wrong, but it's because he cares about you." Said David. Blaine smiled at him, thinking what would Kurt say if he learned David had defended him so strongly in this. Blaine knew his friends liked his boyfriend, but he didn't know one of them had gotten so protective of him.

"I probably took things too hard, didn't I?" Asked Blaine, although not feeling as guilty as before. It was like now he had the problem figured out, he could be calm and rational about it. It wasn't solved yet, and he had a lot of things to discuss with Kurt, but he had found his foot, and that was a big first step.

"You can't be blamed for not handling it the best way. You were mad. But as long as you don't let it escalate beyond repair you should be fine." Said Wes, leaning back on the couch. He had his 'mission accomplished' smirk on.

"Thank you guys. I knew there was a good reason I kept you around." Said Blaine. "It won't be the same without you next year." Wes and David had graduated last year, and they were heading for college in Philadelphia once the summer was over. Blaine was really going to miss them.

"You'll be too busy riding off to the sunset above a candy-colored unicorn with your boy to pay us any mind. You'll be fine." Joked David, patting his back. It was a lame joke, but Blaine laughed anyway. He felt relieved. He could get over this. Him and Kurt, they would be fine.

"I love you both so much!" shouted Blaine suddenly, leaping to his friends, falling on both of them and making them roll on the carpet. Wes and David laughed and groaned and soon they were all wrapped in a cushion-fight, happy that the tension of the night had been lifted.

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><p>Blaine walked to his room after thanking and saying good bye to his friends at the door. He found his cellphone at the nightstand with no missed calls or texts. It was a bit after 1 am, and Blaine debated if it would be rude to write so late. But now that his mind was at ease, he couldn't wait to see Kurt. The past week without him had been hell.<p>

He sort if wanted to explain that he understood better now, that he wasn't mad anymore and that he wanted Kurt to stop worrying because they would be fine. But he didn't know exactly how to convey that in a message, so he set for "_Lima Bean tomorrow at noon?"_

He couldn't help but smile when Kurt's agreement appeared on his phone barely a minute later.

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><p><strong>AN: It would help a lot if you give your opinion about Blaine's train of thought. Does it make sense? I always worry about it.**

**Oh, and Glee's back! What do you guys think was the highlight of episode one? Did you ABSOLUTELY LOVED the Klaine moments? I know I did. "I came here for me. Because I can't stand to be away from the person I love". That phrase shall be forever remembered in the fandom's heart. Also, Blaine's version of "It's not unusual" was to _die_ for. I can't get over it in my head. Can't wait for tomorrow's episode!**

**And am I the only one who thinks Finn is not very happy with Blaine? I SMELL TROUBLE.**

**Don't forget to review!**

**Next chapter: Kurt interlude. We'll finally see things from his eyes.**


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